


Take Me To The Other Side

by JudeAraya



Series: Other Side [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: Anal, Blow Jobs, Fingering, Friends With Benefits, Hand Jobs, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-28
Updated: 2014-01-07
Packaged: 2018-01-06 10:32:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1105754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JudeAraya/pseuds/JudeAraya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>No heavy Kadam or Seblaine at all. In fact, Sebastian doesn't even make an appearance other than reference. The long and the short of it is that I love Klaine and wanted to write them having lots of banter, sex, and learning about each other in new ways. There is no cheating, no angst, no jealousy. </p><p>I cannot thank stut-ter and nachochang for being amazing beta/handholder/friends/women. </p><p>I really want to thank likearumchocolatesouffle for helping me to articulate what I wanted this story to mean. </p><p>This will be posting every few days.</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> No heavy Kadam or Seblaine at all. In fact, Sebastian doesn't even make an appearance other than reference. The long and the short of it is that I love Klaine and wanted to write them having lots of banter, sex, and learning about each other in new ways. There is no cheating, no angst, no jealousy. 
> 
> I cannot thank stut-ter and nachochang for being amazing beta/handholder/friends/women. 
> 
> I really want to thank likearumchocolatesouffle for helping me to articulate what I wanted this story to mean. 
> 
> This will be posting every few days.

_From Blaine: Skype. 15. Code Red._

Kurt looks down when his phone buzzes in class and rolls his eyes at Blaine’s dramatics.

 _To Blaine: make it 30, in class_ he texts back under the table _._

“Oh my god,” Rachel accosts him when they leave class, “you would have gotten in so much trouble Kurt. Professor Langan is incredibly strict about her class policy.” She takes his phone from him.

“Code Red! Why haven't you called him back?”

“Because it’s not a big deal. Code Red is what we came up with for when Blaine needs me ASAP but it’s mostly because he’s being dramatic. Code Black is the real Code Red.”

“I love that you have special codes for Blaine’s admirable sense of drama,” Rachel laughs.

Kurt smiles. “I have my own codes too.”

“Like?” They link arms and walk into the semi fresh New York air from the subway kiosk.

“Code Yellow is a fashion emergency, and Code Purple is a fashion emergency that takes precedence over pretty much everything else. It’s my Code Black.”

Rachel just laughs again.

“So you’re skyping him when you get home?”

“Of course. Bro Code,” he says, eyebrow twitching to underscore the irony. “You call when you can, as soon as you can depending on the level of distress. Code Red means _as soon as I have a minute_ , not _drop it all this moment._ ”

“Bro Code?” Rachel asks and Kurt just looks loftily away. She wouldn’t understand anyway.

~*~

“I think he’s flirting with me,” Blaine says without preamble. Kurt sighs.

“You know he is. _I_ know he is. The mice at the Lima Bean know he is, Blaine.”

“What-- wait mice?!”

“Oh my,” Kurt puts his fingers over his mouth, “had I not mentioned that before?”

Blaine’s eyes kind of bug out. “No! How could you not?”

“Well I am not _sure_ they have mice, I just _think_ I saw one once. And everyone loves the Lima Bean, so I didn’t want to ruin it. I just decided I’d not get anything from there again.”

“Kurt, as my best friend, “ Blaine puts his heart over his chest, eyes wide and wounded and Kurt rolls his eyes, “I am appalled that you’d let me go back there without telling me.”

“Oh calm down Drama Dave,” Kurt waves him off. “Can we focus on the important part of this conversation? Namely, you finally getting your head out of your ass.”

“Fine,” Blaine huffs.

“Don’t pretend you didn’t know he was flirting, his smarm was all over you. You were soaking it up like a sponge.”

Blaine skips over that. “But I didn’t realize he had like, serious intent!”

“Oh?” Kurt feels his ears perk at that. “How do we know now?”

“He sent me a box of Valentines day cookies.”

“Aww.”

“With a faintly suggestive note.”

“Everything that comes out of that man's mouth is suggestive Blaine-”

“And a date and time at the bottom.”

“...oh.”

“Yeah,” Blaine nods and holds the card up, too close to be anything but fuzzy. Kurt bats at the screen like he could push it away.

“Well, what are you going to do?” Kurt perches, literally and metaphorically, at the edge of his seat.

“I don’t know. He’s...he’s kind of a lothario isn’t he?”

Kurt snorts. “That’s one way of putting it.”

“I mean,” Blaine fiddles with the card, “I like him. He’s funny and traveled and it’s nice to be the center of his attention. He’s really good at making me feel like the center of his attention.”

“Something you love.”

“Don’t make me sound like an attention whore,” Blaine says flippantly and Kurt giggles.

“So do you want to go with him?”

“I guess?” Blaine bites his lip and drums the card against his palm with a small fwap-fwap sound. “I just...I think he’ll….expect things. And I don’t know if I’m ready. I always thought I’d do that with a boyfriend. I don’t know that Sebastian does boyfriends.”

“You don’t have to plan your wedding silly,” Kurt smiles. “Go on a date. You can say no. See how it goes. Maybe get a smooch out of it.” Kurt flips him a wink.

Blaine sighs dreamily. “Oh I would love to be kissed.”

“Wouldn’t we all.”

“I bet he’s excellent at it,” Blaine says

“All that practice he must get, I believe,” Kurt adds.

“Don’t be so catty, it looks terrible...who am I kidding, it looks natural on you,” Blaine jokes.

“I’m sorry. You know me. I guess the pangs of jealousy make me a bit mean. The green eyed monster in me knows little respect for the bonds of friendship.”

“It’ll come Kurt,” Blaine encourages softly. “You’ve only been there a few weeks.”

“I do suppose that my expectations were a bit high,” Kurt admits. “Falling off the train into the arms of a dashing, elegant and handsome gentleman who would carry my bags and kiss me tenderly was a bit over the top.”

“Kurt Hummel, the day you stop living an over the top dream, I’ll call the Pope,” Blaine says.

“A useless endeavor.”

“Okay I’ll call McQueen.”

“From the dead?”

“Shut up and work with me here.”

“No _you_ shut up.”

“Both of you-” Santana yells from somewhere in the loft, “fuck off with the foreplay already and take off some clothes.”

“Oh god, she’s listening,” Kurt turns the sound down. “Think about his offer. Text me when you know what you’re going to do.”

“M’kay,” Blaine’s already looking elsewhere at the screen. “I’ll talk to you later tonight when we watch The Bachelorette.”

“See you then!”

~*~

“Definitely a date,” Blaine says smugly as soon as Kurt answered the phone.

“Oh? And was he a gentleman?”

“I’d assume you could extrapolate that since I said it was a date and not a hookup.”

“With you Blaine Anderson, one never knows. One day you’re all sweetness and blushing and the next you’re dancing on tables practically selling… _it_.”

“Sex, Kurt,” Blaine laughs at him. “Say the word.”

Kurt blushes.

“I can know about it,” he brushes at his pants primly, “and be curious and want it without saying the word to you.” He sits up a little straighter.

“Oh it’s just me?” Blaine teases.

“Leave me alone. It’s a long way off. I’d settle for some scandalous hand holding right now.”

“I held your hand once.”

“That wasn’t scandalous B, it was weirdly crossbody and awkward,” then he softens. “But it meant the world to me.”

“Anyway, if you’re done critiquing my hand holding techniques, can we talk about the goodnight kiss?”

Kurt squeals loudly enough to garner grumbles from the living room where Santana and Rachel are hanging out.

“It was lovely,” Blaine sighs. Kurt pushes down the ugly rise of jealousy. Blaine’s finally gotten his first kiss that counts (Blaine insists that making out with Rachel didn’t count, no matter what Rachel says), and he’s well and truly happy for him.

“I don’t need details on tongue-age-”

“Lots of it,” Blaine interrupts, a little too lost in his thoughts.

Kurt claps loudly to break him out of his reverie. “Focus. I need details on _how_ it happened.”

Blaine snaps back to the conversation. “Well the date started off on a strange foot. His sartorial choices left a little to be desired -- sweatervest -” he ignores Kurt’s snort and mumbled _pot calling the kettle_ , “which was obviously from the Gap, I mean god, he’s rich enough that the Gap-”

“Oh gods, yes, say no more,” Kurt says.

“Wrong colors for him too.”

“Tragic. You’d think he could find something that would downplay the ratio of horseteeth to face he struggles with.”

“Kurt-” Blaine warns, “be kind.”

Kurt nods, and pulls back. “I’m sorry that was just mean. Carry on.”

“He took me to a very nice dinner,” Blaine props his chin on his palm and stares off into the distance. “French. He ordered for us in French.”

“He ordered for you?” Kurt frowns.

“Oh god, I know, I know your soul just shriveled a little, but I thought it was romantic. He was trying to take care of me.”

“Well then,” Kurt swallows any concerns. From his impression of Sebastian he seems like the kind of guy who could easily walk all over Blaine. “So did he give you a lovely peck at the door? I suppose ending a date at a dorm room can be somewhat anti-climactic when he’s three doors away.”

“It was by the car actually,” Blaine admits. “He opened the door for me, and then took the takeout container from my hand. And then….” he sighs.

“Wait, what happened with the container?” Kurt asks when the silence has stretched on too long. He can’t help but shudder at the thought of something rich and maybe even buttery spilling out on Blaine’s clothes. They’d spent hours picking them out over the course of the week, it would be tragic to ruin them for a simple kiss.

“Uh, Kurt, can we focus on the important part?”

“Clothing should always be a priority,” Kurt says haughtily.

“Okay well I wasn’t talking about clothes,” Blaine looks at him strangely. “I was about to tell you more about the kiss…”

“Oh. Oh!” Kurt tears himself away from images of ruined clothing. “So how did that go? First real kiss live up to your daydreams?”

Blaine sighs and makes the most disgustingly sweet eyes at the monitor. He even puts his hand over his heart. “It was amazing.”

Kurt wants to gag but keeps his mouth shut because he’s 99% sure what he’s really choking on is envy. Pea green is not a suitable color on anyone.

“Anyway,” Blaine continues, “we kissed for a...bit,” he gives Kurt a familiar smile, wide and what Kurt thinks fondly of as completely dorky, complete with a little eye roll. “And then in courtly manner, he walked me to my room, told me he had a lovely evening and kissed me on the cheek.”

“Wow,” Kurt props his temple on his hand. “I’m- that sounds wonderful.”

“It was,” Blaine looks at him sympathetically and for a second Kurt hates that Blaine can read him so well.

Or that he’s so transparent.

“Shut up,” Kurt says, but it’s said kindly. He gives Blaine a small smile. “I know, I’m too fabulous to end up an old maid, I just have to wait patiently for my prince.”

Blaine laughs.

~*~

“I think I found a prince,” Kurt says without preamble. He hears some shuffling through the phone’s speaker.

“I’ve told you Kurt, there aren’t lost lineages that lead to the Queen, you’re not a forgotten heir,” Blaine explains patiently.

“Shut up, that’s not what I’m talking about,” Kurt shoulders past people heading toward the subway stairs. “Listen I’m about to go down to the train, but are you around tonight? Because I have got the _best_ gossip about Prof. Wilks and Julie from dance _and_ I have news about a potential new beau.”

“Ohh, Kurt you had me at gossip but I’m salivating over the beau,” Blaine teases.

~*~

“So are you going to ask him out?”

“Ehhh,” Kurt settles his laptop off of his lap and onto the bed, feeling overheated. “I don’t know. I mean, he’s older and so handsome, why would he be interested in me?”

“Kurt. You are a catch,” Blaine says definitively. “Besides, I know you’ve had this whole ‘waiting for my prince’ thing happening, but I think it stands to reason that if you go looking, you’ll find one even faster. You’re Kurt Hummel,” he gives Kurt a toothy smile and a wink, “go get him tiger.”

“Oh god, never say that again,” Kurt moans, laughing. “I’ll find a new Millionaire Matchmaker buddy.”

“Please,” Blaine holds up bowties one at a time for Kurt to consider while he talks, “trashy Bravo shows are the bedrock of our friendship.”

“And here I thought it’s that we like each other. The grey one with the green stripes.”

“We like each other?” Blaine sets the other ties aside carefully as he jokes. “I’m really just here for the tv shows and tie advice.”

“Watch it or I’ll start making you watch Designing Women with me.”

“Noooo,” Blaine moans dramatically, “anything but that.”

~*~

“I’ll be there at 4 sharp,” Blaine promises, excitement hopping in his voice.

“And I’ll be stumbling off the plane toward you,” Kurt yawns. “Thanks for coming to pick me up.”

“Please, I’m just excited I didn’t have to fight Burt for it.”

“Blaine,” Kurt reminds him, “it’s never a fight, you only ever win by default.”

“Shush, I like to feel important.”

“Well then, you’re the most important.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Blaine laughs and hangs up. Kurt smiles. He’ll have Blaine for himself until dinnertime, when Carole will be getting home after picking Burt up from his own incoming flight from Washington.

~*~

“Okay so we have options. I can take you to dinner, or we can go back to your house and we can make something for your Dad and Carole for when they get home and we can catch up there.”

“Is it awful to admit that I have all of New York at my feet and I really miss Breadsticks? Please don’t judge.”

“No judgement,” Blaine’s energy is infectious and Kurt giggles. “I bet you miss eating out too.”

“Yes!” Kurt buckles himself in and bounces in his seat. “Being poor sucks.”

“Well, dinner is on me, so tonight, you may dine upon stale breadsticks like a king.”

“Blaine,” Kurt rolls his eyes, “you don’t have to pay, I can afford to get myself dinner.”

“You’ll get me back when I come visit by giving me board,” Blaine says, steering carefully out of the parking garage.

Kurt squeals so loudly Blaine slams on the brakes. “Kurt!”

“Oh my god are you definitely coming then?” Kurt slaps at his arm in his excitement.

“Jesus Kurt didn’t anyone ever tell you not to yell in a moving car?” Blaine lets out a laugh and tries to calm his now pounding heart. He’d planned on telling Kurt over dinner. “Okay you got me, cat’s out of the bag. My parents said I can come for spring break!”

~*~

“I have a confession to make,” Kurt snaps a breadstick in two.

“Do tell,” Blaine says. He wipes stray crumbs that flew over to his side of the table away, then straightens his silverware.

“I kissed Adam last night.”

“Kurt _shut up,_ ” Blaine claps his hands together and bounces.

“You shut up, I don’t need all of Ohio to know,” Kurt whispers.

“Oh my god, tell me everything. All of it.”

“Well we went out to the movies. He let me pick,”

“Consummate gentleman,” Blaine sighs happily,

“And then we went for gelato. I was feeling particularly daring and so I made my move-”

“Kissing over gelato, you Cassanova,” Blaine wiggles his eyebrows.

“No I meant I grabbed his hand,” Kurt corrects him. “Although almost. I wanted to, but then I freaked out a little about kissing him with cold lips and it being sticky and that’s maybe not the best first kiss memory I would want-”

“Kurt Hummel, always on the hunt for perfection,” Blaine swirls his pasta fork carefully.

Kurt gives him a look. “Anyway, once we were done, we went for a moonlight walk in the park. Well, it was supposed to be in the moonlight, but it got cloudy,” he waves a hand. “But all that aside, we wandered a bit until we went down to Lullwater Bridge, so romantic-”

“Which I’ve never seen so I have no idea how to picture this,” Blaine inserts.

“I’ll take you,” Kurt waves a hand. “Anyway, that’s when we kissed. Well, he kissed me.”

“And?”

“And like you said,” Kurt preens a little, “amazing.”

~*~

“What are you doing?” Kurt adjusts his monitor and then flips his light off to get rid of the glare. Blaine’s been totally distracted the whole conversation. “That’s the seventh time you’ve looked down in ten minutes,” he’s trying not to be annoyed and so he jokes, “I know you just had me for three whole days in Ohio, but you can’t be bored with me already, I’ve been home for a week. By my calculations you should be nearing maximum threshold _missing Kurt_ levels.”

“Sorry. Sorry,” Blaine tries to compose his face when he looks up, but ends up covering half of it and laughing sheepishly. “I- I think Sebastian is trying to sext me.”

“Shut up,” Kurt hunkers closer to the screen, “what is he saying?”

“I know you’re busy today, but I hope I’m on your to-do list for later,” Blaine reads aloud. “I tried to cool off with a shower, but baby the thought of you makes me so hot.”

“He did not!”

Blaine holds the screen of his phone up to the screen, as if Kurt would be able to read it that fuzzy and close up.

“That seems awfully forward of him,” Kurt says.

“Well, I mean…” Blaine looks away.

“Oh. _Oh!_ Blaine Devon Anderson what have you not told me?” Kurt hisses.

“Nothing! Nothing,” Blaine rubs the back of his neck.

“You liar! You are a lying liar, you are a terrible liar! You’re rubbing your neck _that is your tell,_ god if you’re going to lie to me at least learn to do it better _you liar_.”

“Jesus Kurt, don’t hold back,” Blaine is holding his stomach he’s laughing so hard.

“Did you lose your virginity and not tell me Blaine?” Kurt whispers. He’s not sure if he’s hurt, outraged, or a little jealous.

“God, no! God, Kurt,” Blaine makes that face then, that weirdly intense and earnest look with his eyebrows, and sometimes it’s just really hard not to laugh at him.

“Okay but you-”

“Okay I have a confession to make,” Blaine sits up and adjusts the lapels of his pj top. “Not that I lost my virginity, but that things have...progressed.”

“Ohhh, progress,” Kurt wiggles a little. “Tell me, tell me! Well maybe without _too_ much detail. Did you flash him some ankle in the quad and overcome his sensibilities?”

“This isn’t a victorian drama Kurt. We were making out last Friday-”

“Friday your date that you told me about already Friday?” Kurt clarifies.

“Okay, I’ve been caught, I didn’t fess up right away.”

Kurt frowns. They tell each other everything. Why-

“I just didn’t know...I guess I was processing?” Blaine says it gently, guessing what Kurt is thinking.

“Well so you guys were making out?” Kurt shakes it off. He might be a little jealous, but that’s okay. Sure, he seems to be moving at a turtle’s pace with Adam -- and all of it is his fault -- but that doesn’t mean he’s not happy for Blaine. Or something.

“Yeah. It was really hot, by the way. His _body_. It was one thing to imagine but another to see, you know,” Blaine moves his eyebrows suggestively, “naked.”

“Careful-” Kurt warns.

“Kurt how can I really tell you what happened if the whole topic is an overshare?”

Kurt thinks on it for a moment. “Okay. I will concede that I’ll have to change the overshare rules. Because I’m dying to know.”

“So what you’re saying is that you want to know but not to be too frank?”

“Yes.”

“Okay well….” Blaine stops.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m just...god now I’m trying to find a way to word it that doesn’t sound crude. Maybe I’ll google some synonyms,” he says, typing fast.

What-? “What did you do that needs googling Blaine, if you were making out?”

“Well obviously it was more than just making out,” Blaine rolls his eyes.

“More than making out but less than losing your virginity?” Kurt feels like he’s trying to solve a riddle.

“Yeah?”

“Blaine, what is in between those?”

“Kurt, did your dad not actually give you the sex talk you swore he gave you?”

“No, god, the horror. He did,” Kurt bends over and fishes around in his desk. “Here, look I kept them for reference,” he waves them around. “Pamphlets!”

“Alright so-”

“So- “ Kurt flips one over and reads through them quickly trying to ignore the blush that spreads over his cheeks, “frottage, oral, manual, self, blah blah, intercrural -- ooh I’d forgotten about that one -- fingers, toys, blah blah…”

When he looks up Blaine is staring at him, eyebrows raised and a speechless look on his face.

“What?”

“Okay Kurt we need to define some things here. You don’t count all of those things as losing your virginity do you?”

“Well, why wouldn’t I?” Kurt puts the pamphlets down.

“Because they don’t?”

“Wait a minute- you think just….just _that_ counts?”

“Of course,” Blaine makes a face.

“What if...I don’t know what if...okay this isn’t me, but just say it were-”

“Uh huh,” Blaine says knowingly.

“What if I never wanted to do that-”

“Either giving or receiving?” Blaine asks. Kurt clears his throat delicately.

“Either.”

“Really? Not either? Ever??” Blaine says it like his mind is blown. Kurt crosses his legs and clears his throat primly.

“That’s not what I am saying,” he has to wave a hand at his face to tamp down the heat in his cheeks. “I mean I have an idea- I mean, never mind.”

“Kurt’s getting shyyyyyy,” Blaine teases.

“Shush now for a second,” Kurt stops him and wills his blush to die. “My point is, if I never wanted to do it at all, but was okay with everything else here,” he waves his pamphlets around, “then I am a virgin and always will be?”

“Huh,” Blaine looks up. “I’ll have to think about that. But I mean, I guess you would find a loophole anywhere right?”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Kurt says.

“Okay well, you tell me, what do you think counts?”

“When two people agree to it beforehand and they both have...you know,” he gestures with his hands.

“Orgasms?” Blaine tries to pry the word out.

“Yes,” Kurt huffs out a sigh.

“I think-” Blaine looks down when he gets another text and then back, “I think we define this very differently from one another.”

“What a world we live in. I’m scandalized,” Kurt puts his hand over his heart and turns a shoulder.

“Even though I can’t see it cause my screen is crappy, I know you were batting your eyes there too.”

“It’s nice to be able to trust that someone knows me that well,” Kurt sighs.

“Yeah,” Blaine looks at him, a plain look that says the words Kurt speaks next.

“I miss you.”

“Yeah, this isn’t the same without you,” Blaine clears his throat. “After...with Sebastian...I wanted to come to you and talk and just...you’re not here,” he shrugs.

“What would you tell me?” Kurt asks softly.

“That it was more fun than I thought it would be. That I didn’t realize I’d be so okay with it even though we’re not exclusive or anything. That the whole thing is actually kind of awkward when you can’t laugh about how weird it is with them.”

Kurt doesn’t say anything, but thinks, _when it’s me, I want a guy I can laugh about it with because I can’t think of anything weirder._

“But still, overall I give it a good eight out of ten. You know, give it a little room to grow.”

“Wow, for a first timer I think you maybe rated yourself a little highly there,” Kurt jokes.

“I was the ten, who are you kidding?” Blaine teases back.

“So….” Kurt is dying to know but can’t think of how to ask. God, he really does have a lot of detail overshare rules he doesn’t want violated...but it’s not violating if he is asking right?

“We jerked each other off,” Blaine butts into his thoughts.

“Oh dear god no,” Kurt slaps his hands over his eyes like the images might not infiltrate. “I hadn’t decided if I was going to ask or not!”

“I thought I’d save you the agony of indecision. Anyway, like I said, not a huge ordeal. I definitely don’t qualify that as losing the big V.”

Kurt’s quiet for a minute, and waits until he can look into Blaine’s eyes. “I would.”

Blaine’s eyes soften. “Yeah, I know. It’ll happen Kurt.”

“Not if I insist on being a prude the rest of my life,” Kurt shrugs, feeling prickly in his skin and annoyed with himself.

“You aren’t a prude. You’re private. You’re selective. You’re Kurt Hummel, come on.”

Kurt smiles. “This is true. I am fabulous. It’ll be a challenge, finding anyone as fabulous as I to share the experience with.”

“Maybe you already have?”

Kurt smiles a secret sort of smile. “Maybe.”

~*~

“I think tonight’s the night,” Kurt flops onto the bed where the laptop lays and for a second Blaine’s face bounces off to the left when it almost falls off the edge.

“Tonight? Kurt it’s 6pm!”

“I know, and I know I’m cutting it close but I think I want tonight to be the night and so I need advice.”

“What kind of advice? Kurt I’ve stuck my hand down a guy's pants twice in my life, that’s hardly the romantic first time you’re going for here.”

“Oh,” Kurt feels kind of sad. “That’s how it went?”

“Okay well no, it was quite a lot less tawdry than that. Still. It was fine for me. I just think you’d want something a little different.”

“What does that mean?” Kurt frowns.

“It means you deserve something really special.”

“Blaine.”

“I don’t mean I don’t either. I just mean….it didn’t feel like I was losing my virginity Kurt. I didn’t feel like this pressure to make it the most memorable moment ever. _When_ and _If_ I do lose it, trust me, there will be a script and a lighting crew and marks and everything.”

“Well that might actually do more to ruin the romance, don’t you think?” Kurt teases.

“You know what I mean,” Blaine smiles and looks down.

“Okay then,” Kurt feels nerves rise so fast they double as nausea. “I have to go start getting ready. Um. Any advice?”

“Let yourself enjoy it. Have fun,” Blaine says.

“Enjoy. Check. Fun. Okay. Can do,” he pauses. “Wish me luck?”

“Get lucky!” Blaine says. “That’s way more appropriate here, don’t you think?”

“I suppose,” Kurt says, laughing.

“Alright then. Be careful, have fun, and GET LUCKY!”

“Blaine, you are incorrigible,” Kurt rolls his eyes and blows the monitor a kiss before closing out the screen.

Kurt looks at the clothes he’d laid out. It’s an outfit he’d had Blaine help him pick a few weeks ago, a _just in case_ and a _for when I’m ready_. Pieces that are flattering but easier to remove. Not too easy, because Blaine had agreed that there was something very sensual and erotic about peeling someone out of clothing. Slipping some buttons through a shirt was sexy. Unhooking four straps to get through one layer of a bondage shirt and then finding a sweater and a button down under it -- not.

One last glance at the clock tells him he’s almost out of time, and so with a fortifying breath, he begins to get ready.


	2. Chapter 2

Kurt skypes Blaine first thing Saturday morning after two demanding texts insisting he wake up and talk him through his meltdown.

“Okay, okay I’m here,” Blaine scrubs a hand through his impressive case of bedhead. “What’s going on?”

“I couldn’t go through with it,” Kurt blurts out. Blaine squints at him then connects the dots.

“That’s...are you okay with that?”

“Yeah? I mean...I’m glad I didn’t because I didn’t feel ready. But-” Kurt fiddles with the cuff of his sweater.

“But?”

“He’s 22 and probably expects it!” Kurt manages.

“ _Kurt_ ,” Blaine tilts his head like he does when he really means what he’s saying, and it makes Kurt miss him so much. Only a few more days and Blaine will be in New York with him. “He’s a nice guy right? And you like him, your taste is impeccable. I think he probably is okay with going at your pace if he’s such a nice guy.”

“Yes. You’re right,” Kurt shakes his head. “I decided last night that I’m going to ask him out on another date for Friday. I really want this, and even though I had these ideas about how it would happen, life doesn’t go that way. I mean...look at me. I came out here with nothing but some savings. It worked out.”

“It did,” Blaine beams at him.

“I’m gonna go for it. Start a new chapter,” Kurt smiles at Blaine. “Be a new me.”

“Well then,” Blaine settles a bit with the computer and his image jostles around. “Do we need to discuss a new outfit for this occasion?”

Kurt laughs, “Yes, oh god. I used my planned “get lucky” outfit last night.”

~*~

“Okay I’ve been dying to ask,” Blaine tucks his legs under himself on the couch. “Did it happen?”

Kurt turns his shoulder, a little coy. “Not in so many words, no-”

“How many words do you need for ‘I lost my virginity’?” Blaine settles back. The loft is quiet around them, the flurry of Santana’s high boot heels clacking around finally gone. On the coffee table Kurt’s left his glass of wine she’d given them with a quarter in it. Blaine’s on his second.

“Blaine,” he says with affection, “you mean, how many to admit that I didn’t?”

Kurt tilts his head and feels the heat in his face like a brand. It’s not like this over Skype -- they talk about everything and it’s always fine because it’s Blaine. It’s the wine bringing a hectic warmth to his skin, and he doesn’t want Blaine to think he’s actually blushing.

“So what happened?” Blaine takes another sip then frowns at Kurt’s glass, leans over and hands it to him.

Kurt takes a sip then purses his lips. He doesn’t really like wine much, not red wine like this, the kind Blaine favors.

“Ku-urt,” Blaine jiggles his knee. “I thought _Operation Let Myself Be Seduced_ was a go.”

“It was,” Kurt starts. “I- I mean it was supposed to be I swear! But then it was -- his hand was under my shirt and it-” he closes his eyes at the memory, “it tickled okay! And I didn’t mean to I accidentally kn-kneed him-”

“Kurt you didn’t!”

“It-” he starts to laugh and covers his too-hot face, “It wasn’t on p-purpose.”

Blaine has a two hand hold on his wineglass as he giggles over the image, their laughter escalating until Kurt has to grab Blaine’s glass and set it down with his own lest they spill.

“Oh-” Blaine shuffles a bit, rests his hand on Kurt’s knee, “I guess that spoiled the mood then.”

“To say the least,” Kurt offers dryly.

“So that was yesterday. If I hadn’t have come today...oh god did I cock-block? I totally did, you could be on a date with him right now, losing-”

“No! No you aren’t...blocking...anything,” Kurt says as delicately as he can with an eyebrow twitch and an affectionate smile. He shrugs, picks his wineglass back up to have something to fiddle with. He runs his fingers up and down the smooth glass stem. “I want to be with you.”

“But I could have hung out with Santana tonight and you could have had the loft to yourself. We could have set the scene…” Blaine taps his chin with a finger, “flower petals ...just a few, scattered on the sheets. We’d have to have them a little rumpled. Not like… _I’ve been rolling around in here jerking off to thoughts of you-_ ”

“Blaine!”

“But like sexy tousled, you know?” Blaine narrows his eyes earnestly.

“Blaine, forget about the sheets for a second,” Kurt interrupts. “I don’t want to tousle any sheets when I could be hanging out with my _best friend_ the three days he’s here.”

Blaine leans his head back on the sofa then rolls his head to look at him. His eyes shine dark in the low lighting.

“Yeah?”

“Of course dummy. _Operation Let Myself Be Seduced_ can happen any other time.”

“But after you decided it was a definite go, aren’t you dying - I mean…” Blaine wiggles his fingers in a gesture Kurt isn’t sure how to read.

“You mean?” he asks.

“To do it Kurt,” Blaine finally stage whispers with comedically wide eyes.

“Oh!” Kurt shrugs one shoulder as elegantly as he can manage. “Well yeah but…” he pauses and bites his lip again, “I don’t know- I...I want to, but it didn’t feel quite right, again.”

He waits out Blaine’s laughter, finishing off his last sip of wine. He feels pleasant, loose and warm but not buzzed. He debates another and decides not.

“Okay but you said his hand was in your shirt, how far did you even get?”

“Not very,” Kurt admits. “I mean it wasn’t the first time, we’ve done the shirtless thing.”

“Mmm,” Kurt can tell Blaine is picturing Adam without a shirt on. It’s a pretty mmmm-worthy sight, he can vouch.

“I was just so nervous,” Kurt admits and Blaine opens his eyes and watches him with unguarded sympathy. “I knew what I was going to do and it’s just...I didn’t feel ready to...you know, give him my flower,” he jokes, trying to lighten the mood.

“Give him your flower? Oh my god, please tell me that Rachel isn’t making you marathon Friends when I’m not looking.”

“It’s funny!” Kurt defends. “And she says I need to expand my horizons. Apparently I was watching too many episodes of Designing Women on repeat.”

Blaine smiles. “She might have a point there.”

“Shut up,” Kurt smacks his bicep with the back of his hand.

“So you still don’t feel ready, huh?”

“I mean, I’m a guy,” Kurt wiggles his shoulders a bit. “I have needs. But...is it stupid that I want a connection?”

“You don’t feel like you have a connection with Adam?” Blaine asks, obviously surprised.

“I should say, _the_ connection,” Kurt clarifies. “I mean...not that there’s only one in the world for the rest of my life,” he tries to laugh off the wistfulness in his tone. Which is pointless, Blaine will see right through it anyway. “I guess I’m just a silly romantic. I think about what my father told me and think, why can’t it be like that? Why shouldn’t my first time _mean_ something? Be with someone who really means something to me? Someone I maybe love?” he groans and closes his eyes. “That’s so lame, isn’t it?”

“No, no, come on Kurt,” Blaine’s fingers are five heat points on his shoulder. “You know I don’t think that’s lame at all.”

“Adam is…” Kurt traces his lower lip while he mulls it over. “He’s funny and handsome and smart and kind...and maybe in a while...I could fall in love with him, right?”

“You could,” Blaine says.

The room falls into quiet that is suddenly pierced by the shrill of a siren down the street. Kurt sees Blaine flinch; he’s used to the city noise enough by now that he’s unfazed.

“Blaine, do you think I’m a prude?”

“No,” Blaine laughs. “Despite your euphemisms and insistence that sex involves anything below the waist-”

“Hey, watch yourself Mr. Judgemental-” Kurt warns, but Blaine just drops him a sweet smile.

“I’m kidding. But no, trust me. As your best friend, I know that you are definitely not a prude. You might name the files creatively, but don’t think I don’t know about your tasteful black and white collection of artistic porn.”

“Oh my god, _shut up,_ ” Kurt laughs and covers his eyes with one hand. “You pervert, what were you doing looking at my porn?”

“It was an accident!”

“What, you needed to see my report on Siberian Russia from junior year?”

“I did!” Blaine folds up one leg and rests his cheek on it while he looks at Kurt. “Really. I was doing a report for world geography and saw it and thought it might have something useful in it.”

Kurt snorts indelicately. “I bet it did.”

“You have no idea,” Blaine waggles his eyebrows.

“Ew...” Kurt waves a hand. “No really, I know you, you don’t like keeping anything to yourself. Spare me- wait hold on, were you in my room?”

“Well, but hold on-”

“Oh my god, you jerked off in my room!” Scandalized, Kurt pokes his socked toes into Blaine’s side, making him laugh helplessly. “You are disgusting. You are a depraved human being, Blaine Devon Anderson.”

“Please, like you’ve never done it at my house.”

“I have not, what-”

“What about that one time after the pool party where-”

“Oh my god shut up shut up, oh my god,” Kurt covers his face and burns with mortification. Blaine just laughs.

“We’re never talking about this again,” Kurt finally announces. “I’ll pretend like I don’t know what you’ve done to defile the sanctity of my room and we’ll never speak of the downstairs powder room in your mother’s house again,” he gives Blaine a steely look.

“Done,” Blaine holds his hand out and they shake.

~*~

“More wine?” Kurt offers after a bit. Blaine’s been humming while they sit and contemplate the twinkle lights they’ve strung around the apartment.

“No, I’m kind of sleepy.”

“Oh good, I didn’t want to have to get up anyway,” Kurt yawns and stretches his legs out to cross at the ankle, propped off the edge of the table. He picks up the harmony when Blaine begins humming again. Soon enough they are singing quietly. God, he’s missed Blaine. He reaches out blindly and finds Blaine’s hand, twining their fingers together. Rachel is one hell of a best friend, but nothing compares to Blaine.

“Hey Kurt, can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” Kurt says.

“Do you really want to do it?”

“Um, yeah?” Kurt stares at him. “I thought we’d established this.”

“No I mean...with Adam or at all? Like is this just because you want to do it?”

“Blaine,” Kurt sighs. “I’m not sure I get what you’re saying.”

“You don’t have to just because you have a boyfriend, you know?” Blaine’s being earnest again.

“We’re not exclusive. I mean-” Kurt blushes, “he’s not my boyfriend.”

“Okay. Well if he were your boyfriend would you be more ready?”

Kurt takes a moment to answer. “I’d probably feel more comfortable. I mean...it’s going to happen. I want it to happen. I don’t want to wait forever, but what if that guy isn’t out there, or I won’t meet him forever, I’ll be destined to die a virgin because I’m hopelessly romantic and...I just wish it were with someone-”

“Okay,” Blaine stares ahead, lost in thought for a bit.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Kurt finally says after the silence seems to have dragged on for too long.

“Kurt?” Blaine’s looking at him strangely, eyes assessing and head tilted.

“Yeah?”

“Can I...try something? Will you trust me?”

“Um-” Kurt licks his lips, unsure about the look Blaine’s giving him, “sure?”

Blaine levers himself up, then slowly leans over toward Kurt with one hand on the sofa between them. Kurt stares at him and then Blaine cups the back of his neck with his free hand.

“Oh!” he says softly, stupidly, just before Blaine’s lips are on his, dry but soft and confident. Kurt bows back a little and inhales sharply. The world tilts and like he’s always been in his life, Blaine’s his centerpoint, his axis, and its instinct that puts Kurt’s hand on Blaine’s warm cheek to ground him.

It’s not instinct but want that has his lips opening eagerly. Blaine’s mouth is sweet and full and it’s touch zaps through to the marrow of his bones and makes him greedy. Their tongues just brush when he pulls back suddenly.

“What are you - Blaine- you said you wanted to try something, this - you ..kissing! That’s not trying something!”

“I know, I know,” Blaine holds his hands out placatingly, sitting back on his heels. “Just hear me out- consider the kissing a data point. I need to collect data.

“That might be the worst line I’ve ever heard.” Kurt scowls at him, “ And I mean truly, the absolute worst.”

“Just give me a chance to talk. I have an idea, but I need to collect some data to be sure it’s going to work.”

“And the point of all of this is?” Kurt says, flipping his palm up in the air.

“Your Adam problem.”

“I don’t really have an Adam problem, per se, more of a-”

“Kurt.”

“Yeah.”

“I need data. Shut up.”

And then he kisses Kurt again.

“Wait-”

It’s hard to hear, Kurt thinks dimly, when someone isn’t talking. It’s harder to hear when that someone is busy putting their tongue in your mouth and your ears are ringing from the sheer heat and delicious sumptuousness of it.

“Wait, wait,” Kurt pulls back, surprised to find that he’s breathing hard. “What kind of data?

“Just, try to enjoy yourself okay? Forget I’m your friend and just pretend I’m any guy you want to be kissing you.”

Kurt’s not really sure he can forget it’s Blaine kissing him, not when his warm breath and close body hit him with their distinct Blaine smell, something he’s so familiar with. He’s smelled it millions of times, in hugs and in his pillows when he sleeps over, in the cardigans he sometimes borrows and the inside of his car.

He can’t forget this is Blaine, but he can do his best to enjoy the kiss, because he trusts Blaine and is weirdly, easily happy enough to go along. Blaine’s an excellent kisser, so it’s no hardship to enjoy that. Kurt tilts his head into the next kiss. Blaine’s mouth is wet, uncharted; new and provocative. Kurt opens his mouth with a lick and by sucking Blaine’s bottom lip into his own. Blaine’s tongue in his mouth so soft and completely self-assured. Kurt’s breath ratchets up and he starts to feel his body waking up to it, to the soft touches Blaine’s trailing down his neck and over his shoulders and the perfect, sexy insistence of his lips.

“What are you-” Kurt breaks away and gasps, “not that I’m complaining necessarily, but-”

“I was thinking,” Blaine’s forehead is resting against his. Kurt’s eyes are open and this close, Blaine seems to have millions of lashes, soot black and unfairly long. He finally pulls away. His hand spreads wide over Kurt’s knee and he frowns down at it. Kurt waits him out patiently. He’s off footed from the sudden and shocking change in activities, buzzing with the sparking energy of kisses, and dazed.

“You trust me right?” Blaine finally speaks.

“Yes,” Kurt says immediately.

“You feel safe with me?”

“Blaine,” Kurt says with confused affection, “I have no idea what you’re doing and what the hell that was about, but yes. Of course.”

“And you know I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“So I thought...what if it was with me?”

Kurt’s brain seems to experience a time lag where the meaning of those words comes to him about 14 seconds after they’re uttered.

“Wait _it_ , it?”

“Well...yeah?” Blaine says unsurely.

“Okay, how much wine did you have?” Kurt asks. _How much wine did I have,_ he thinks frantically because _oh_ , his body thinks this is a great idea.

“We’re comfortable with each other. I’ve already seen you naked-”

“Oh my god just that once, how does that even-”

“You’re very attractive, so you know, it’s not like it would be any hardship,” Blaine continues.

“Oh well there’s a winning argument,” Kurt jumps in. “ _I could get through it if I had to._ ”

“That’s not what I said,” Blaine inches closer, cups Kurt’s cheek kindly. “What I’m trying to say...what if you could have a first time with someone you feel special with, with someone you love? Someone you could make a meaningful memory with. We can wake up tomorrow and nothing has to change other than we’ll have something else we share that no one else will understand and that we’ll never have with anyone else.”

Kurt looks away.

“Please Kurt, let me,” Blaine breathes out, eyes suddenly dark, breathing seduction and promise. He trails his fingers down Kurt’s chest slowly, deliberately. Over Kurt’s suddenly straining nipple.

“Oh,” he whispers, surprised. He watches Blaine’s hand traverse slowly, suggestively over each button of his shirt down to where they leave off at his belt buckle.

“Yeah?” Blaine leans into his space, hot breath so much against his neck, and his body is lit hot but somehow shivering. He’s nervy and turned on -- really, unexpectedly turned on -- and very much wants Blaine’s hands and mouth to keep going. Blaine kisses his neck softly, a small experiment.

“If you’re collecting data, I should tell you that that f-feels,” he tries to quell the tremors in his body, “really good.”

“Noted,” Blaine bites down then sucks just where his scar is. Kurt puts his hands on Blaine’s shoulders carefully, tests the shape of his body differently. This is Blaine sensual, not the body he knows how to hug in comfort and friendship. Kurt leans back, pressing at Blaine’s shoulder blades a little, and they manage to situate themselves lying on the sofa, bodies still a little apart. With one hand, Blaine starts to slip the buttons of Kurt’s shirt open, eyes wide on his, assessing, waiting for any flicker of uncertainty, Kurt knows.

He’s now achingly hard and it’s hard not to take and take, to roll up into Blaine. He opens his legs and props one up with a knee bent. His fingers find the hem of Blaine’s shirt and tug it out of his waistband. Underneath, his skin is like butter, hot melting soft. Blaine’s kissing his way up to Kurt’s jaw, so Kurt turns his face into those kisses, capturing his mouth and swallowing Blaine’s small noises, little exhales of pleasure as Kurt’s fingers travel north. He rucks up his shirt and undershirt, bump bump bump over knobs of spine then swoops up the ridge of a scapula until there’s too much material bunched up.

“Sit up a little,” Kurt whispers. Blaine whips his shirt off, turning to throw it on the floor. Halfway out of his own, Kurt has to pause. He’s seen Blaine’s body a million times, but never through these eyes.

With a lover’s gaze.

“Oh my.”

Blaine smiles, a little flirty and a little wicked, then uses those clever fingers to slip Kurt shirtless too. “I’ll say the same. God, Kurt,” he nuzzles Kurt’s solar plexus, exhaling pleasured surprise, then tempering it with a sweet kiss.

“Check in,” he tries to settle on Kurt.

“What?” he’s distracted by Blaine’s skin, settling onto his. On Blaine’s erection, throbbing against the tindered inside of his thigh.

“Everything okay? Are you still okay with this?”

Kurt stops kissing Blaine’s shoulders to pull back. “Are you going to check in the whole time?”

“Maybe?”

“Don’t be a mood killer Anderson,” Kurt smiles, then smacks their lips together cheekily. “I’m fine. I’m surprisingly fine. I think I’m…” He stops to think, then cups Blaine’s cheek with a damp palmed hand. “Grateful.”

“Grateful?” Blaine smiles tenderly back, then kisses each corner of his mouth. They’re small touches, newly sown seeds he’s burrowed in Kurt’s body already. With this, their commitment to friendship and trust, they’re blooming, rich hues of purple and amber and mauve, resonant desire and sex, his body springs forward.

“That it’s you.”

Blaine smiles.


	3. Chapter 3

They kiss like that for long minutes. Shifting, slipping and barely rubbing against each other. Blaine has to move his hand more than once because it keeps sliding between the couch cushions.

“I’m about to get a leg cramp,” Kurt admits a bit later. He’s awkwardly on the sofa, one leg dangling, using the leverage of his toes to hold himself in position. Blaine’s lips are lush red and his curls are beginning their slow rebellion. Affection sweeps through him so deep it leaves Kurt breathless.

“You should stick with American Crew,” he says, touching one lock with the tip of a finger.

Blaine rolls his eyes even as he struggles to sit up away from Kurt, and feels over his head carefully. “They’re coming out aren’t they?” he says as he tries to pat them back into place.

“No, don’t,” Kurt takes his hand and moves it away, then gently traces a whorl of hair. “You look tousled. Sexy,” he licks his lips and looks down at the admission.

Blaine seems to test the silence. “Kurt are you sure you want to do this?” he asks one last time.

“Do you?” _Oh shit, what if he’s changed his mind?_

“Oh god, yes,” Blaine says, then clears his throat.

“Then yes. It’s just...strange. To call you sexy. To see you like this, because you are _so_ sexy. It’s not that I don’t know or haven’t noticed that you are attractive. But I’ve never felt it,” he fists his hands over his stomach, “so deep, in here.”

“Yeah,” Blaine’s eyes rove over his face, like he’s taking in every feature for the first time. He licks his lips then traces Kurt’s with one finger, pulling it away from his teeth a little.

“Want to-” Kurt swallows, “um..bed?” he huffs out a laugh and closes his eyes. “I m-mean go to my bed. For you know. Um...the- the sex?”

Blaine laughs fondly, then takes his hand and pulls him up. They walk to the bedroom, Blaine leading. Kurt watches the subtle shift of muscle play along his back, the way his waist, so small, tapers into his pants. His ass. Wow. Blaine has a fantastic ass. He’s always known this objectively, but now that he knows he’s going to be able to put his hands on it, it’s...amazing. He can’t wait to feel the heft and warmth of that ass in each palm.

“What are you thinking about?” Blaine lets go of his hand to climb up on the bed. He gets up on his knees and faces Kurt. From this position he’s taller. Kurt leans into the kiss he sees coming, placing his hands gently on Blaine’s hips. Against his fingers, Blaine’s hipbones are a beautiful prominent rise on the landscape of his torso. Heat coils in his belly when he has to tilt his head up toward Blaine’s lips.

“Can I?” he pulls away and kisses Blaine’s neck gently, wanting to explore.

“Anything,” Blaine whispers and shivers. Kurt takes a moment, resting his head in the crook of Blaine’s neck like he would anytime he hugs Blaine. Smells him and feels centered and this is so strange but wonderful and nothing like making out with Adam, because there’s no worry or second guessing. No lingering concern that he’ll do something Adam hates.

He starts to explore, licking Blaine’s collarbones carefully, thumbing at his nipples.

“Oh I like that,” Blaine says like it’s a revelation, when Kurt scrapes a fingernail over a hardened nub. Kurt wonders if that’s something Sebastian’s never done.

He likes that thought. He wants to share something with Blaine that can be theirs. Their years of friendship and how much Blaine’s meant to him, and he wants this for them, not just for himself. Kurt remembers what Blaine had said about his first time. He’s never really asked for details since then.

He pushes Blaine back a bit, and then crawls seductively over him, surprising even himself.

“Tell me something you want,” he says, kissing from Blaine’s belly button up to his sternum, then on to the lovely valley between his collarbones.

“Right now, you,” Blaine says faintly.

“Have-” Kurt pauses and thinks, then kisses Blaine deeply, wet and increasingly messy kisses. Soon they are both panting into each other’s mouths and press up against each other. Blaine is hard against him and even though it feels so good, it’s not nearly enough friction to build to anything more than frustration. He bites softly at Blaine’s ear, “-has he blown you?”

“What?” Blaine hand splays over Kurt’s chest. His heart is pounding; Blaine must feel it.

“I…I want to do something you haven’t done.”

Blaine watches him with half-lidded eyes, lips shining wet and all allure. “You want something we can share,” he guesses. Kurt peppers kisses against his lips. Blaine’s hands brush sweetly up his back as he sighs into Kurt’s mouth.

“Yeah,” Kurt admits.

“I do too. We haven’t,” Blaine rolls them until they’re on their sides, then starts to undo the button to Kurt’s pants with shaking fingers. He flicks his eyes up to Kurt. “Either way.”

“Good,” Kurt smiles and feels a bit wicked. “So...I really want to blow you.”

Blaine runs his fingers through Kurt’s hair, which he can feel falling out of its hold. “Any particular reason?”

“I just...think that would be...sexy? I’ve always fantasized about-” Kurt lays down next to Blaine and looks him in the eyes. There’s something about them like this, half-naked, turned on, and about to leap into something unknown, that makes it even easier to confide in him. “About going down on someone. What it would feel like...in my mouth,” he looks at Blaine a little shyly. “What it would taste like.”

“You-” Blaine runs his hand up Kurt’s side and shivers wrack up and down his body, “you want that?”

Kurt bites his lip, eyes on Blaine’s mouth and fingers trailing along his belt. “Yes. So much.”

Blaine shifts his hips so Kurt’s fingers can slip his belt free. “Alright. But will you take yours off too?” He tugs at one of Kurt’s pockets.

Kurt laughs, opening the flaps of Blaine’s pants. He’s wearing red underwear. His eyes flutter shut when Blaine does the same for him, fingers so, so close to the epicenter of the heat and desire flooding his system.

“On three?” Blaine says.

“How about now,” Kurt’s already pushing Blaine’s pants down, only half effectively because they’re so tight.

“You’re so impatient,” Blaine bats Kurt’s hands out of the way and starts to wiggle out of his own pants. “Yours are probably even tighter. Do your own and we’ll be naked faster.” They’re both giggling, elbows and knees bumping and then his pants are off and Kurt wants to look but can’t bring himself to because this is it. His first time ever with another man. And it’s Blaine. He’s about to have sex with Blaine.

“Second thoughts?” Blaine sounds breathless and when Kurt summons the nerve to look at his eyes instead of a point just past his shoulder, he sees that Blaine is looking at him -- all of him, eyes drinking in every aspect of his naked body, his stupidly freckled shoulders and red flushed chest and pink pebbled nipples and his straining, red and wet tipped cock. He’s suddenly aware of every part of himself he’s ever had a moment of discomfort or insecurity over. His kneecaps which seem oddly hairy to him. His dick lists slightly to the left and his too pale skin. He wraps a hand around his middle to hide it.

“Oh my god Kurt, don’t even, you’re gorgeous,” Blaine moves his hand for him. “Can I touch you?”

“Aren’t you already?” Kurt jokes. He brings himself to look down and gasps. Blaine’s erection is flushed, almost purple red at the tip. It’s shorter and thicker than his own and his balls look soft and heavy where they rest against his leg. Kurt’s mouth floods with saliva because he’s going to have that in his mouth. Blaine touches the tip of Kurt’s dick, smearing a drop of precome on his finger. He looks at Kurt with deliberate confidence and a touch of daring and then slowly raises his finger to his mouth and licks it off, small kitten licks.

“Oh god, Blaine,” Kurt gives in then. Cups Blaine’s cock and then lets his fingers wander to feel the soft give of the skin of his ballsack. “Can I- now?” he asks impatiently, putting his hand on Blaine’s shoulder and pushing him back onto his back.

“I’m not going to stop you.”

“Wow, okay,” Kurt pushes Blaine’s thighs apart gently, climbing between them. Nervously he runs his palms up and down the insides of Blaine’s thighs where he’s warm and softly furred, all strong lean male body and muscle.

“Okay?” Blaine’s starting to look a bit nervous. Kurt realizes how exposed he must feel, sprawled open and naked with a man between his legs doing nothing but staring blankly.

“Okay if I’m terrible at this, just...I’ve never done it before,” Kurt rushes to explain.

“Kurt,” Blaine says it with such affection and sweetness, it’s nothing for Kurt to give his belly a kiss. Blaine’s fingers are gentle in his hair. “We’re both new to this. You want to give me a blowjob for godsake,” he laughs. “I think it’s going to be amazing no matter what. And-” he smiles down at Kurt, who has settled on his belly between Blaine’s knees and is softly kissing his pelvis from hipbone to crease.

“And?” Kurt prompts, using a finger to circle the heft of Blaine’s balls, marveling at the soft spongy skin and its give and how warm Blaine is like this.

“It’s you,” Blaine says simply. Kurt smiles and rests his head on Blaine’s hip, gathering himself and then breathing him in where he’s basic and male. It’s nothing then to breathe deep and kiss the base of his cock, then up a little; to drag his lips up with just the tip of his tongue poking out to leave a damp little trail up the length of his erection.

“Oh-” Blaine exhales into a small moan.

“Please tell me if-”

“Don’t stop-” Blaine manages, and then Kurt takes another breath and just dives in, opening his mouth wide to take Blaine’s dick in. It’s wider than he expected, and he can taste the tang of his precome at the tip. He takes his time exploring, letting his tongue map the ridge around the head and the channel of his frenulum. He tries to swallow his spit so it won’t get everywhere, but after a bit gives up.

At first he just lets himself taste and get used to it. Above him Blaine is gasping, the occasional whispered _shit_ barely discernable. His hands are still on Kurt’s head, cradling him, creating a closed circuit between their bodies and Kurt’s never felt so close to anyone before in his life.

There’s something terribly powerful about being able to give someone pleasure like this, in seeing Blaine so trusting, giving himself over without boundaries and helpless to whatever Kurt can give him.

He’s never loved Blaine more. He applies more suction and swallows down Blaine’s dick, testing response (a much louder moan), and pulls away to blow gently at the wet suckled head (no real response). He swallows Blaine back down and hums lightly ( _oh! mmmm, yeah_ ), and then cradles the delicate weight of his balls and rolls them while sucking and humming and working at Blaine until Blaine is crying out with it and his own lips are numb and jaw sore and body stiff from the awkward angle.

Here Blaine is delicious, his desire and his body, the way he smells and feels and when he comes, a deep powerful feeling tightness in Kurt’s body. Blaine throbs so hard in his mouth, fills it with so much come he has to pull off with a cough and can’t manage to swallow it all -- it tastes strange.

“Oh my god,” he wipes his chin with his wrist, smacking his numb lips and feeling it all vibrate and vibrate through his wrecked body. A collection of movements, just a mouth and some work and yet the most incredible fucking _,_ and _oh,_ he’s so turned on he thinks he’ll come if Blaine so much as sneezes in his direction. “Oh my god Blaine that was amazing.”

“Uh,” is all Blaine manages. His muscles are still twitching, his cock giving small little jerks as aftershocks slow through. His hands are over his face.

“Are-” Kurt starts to feel himself coming down from his high, “are you okay?”

“Umhmmm, yeah-” Blaine slurs, then opens his hands for Kurt’s. “‘’mazing.”

He kisses Kurt slow and lazy, taking his time, nibbling at his lips like his mouth is a feast and he has hours to eat. He pulls Kurt down and closer but Kurt wriggles away.

“I think I’m too worked up,” Kurt admits, red faced and hanging his head a little, but smiling hugely enough that it’s clear he’s not embarrassed really. Blaine’s smile is something so familiar, the way he looks at Kurt then. Like he knows what Kurt is thinking without him saying.

Kurt is thinking that this is the best thing ever. Blaine has the best ideas.

“I have the best ideas don’t I?” Blaine smiles indulgently. He doesn’t pull Kurt closer yet, and Kurt knows it’s because he’s giving Kurt time to cool off. He doesn’t want his half of losing his virginity to be over in 15 seconds.

“You do have them,” Kurt admits. “I would never have imagined this and it not being weird, you know?”

“Do you feel weird?” Blaine is running his hand soothingly up and down Kurt’s arm.

“No, that’s exactly it. Not with you. Like….if I tried that with Adam, I think I would have been freaking out so much about not knowing what I was doing and not knowing if he’d be too much of a gentleman to tell me he hated something or having no idea what he was thinking...how do people enjoy sex with new people?”

“God only knows,” Blaine laughs at him. “Thank god you know what I’m thinking. All this time I’ve had a mind reading best friend. Oh the secrets I thought I’d been keeping!”

“Ha ha,” Kurt lays down carefully next to him. “Don’t think I don’t know about what happened with Trent sophomore year, or who was really behind that failed prank in Mr. Hagley’s classroom.”

“Who told you?” Blaine laughs. His teeth shine bright and his eyes scrunch up with it, and he’s the most adorable and loveable person Kurt knows.

“I have my ways,” Kurt’s starting to feel calmer...or at least a little less hair trigger sensitive. He gives Blaine what he hopes is a come-hither look. Blaine just raises an eyebrow.

“I’ll have you know I’ve been told this actually is a sexy face.”

“I’ll take your word as truth then,” Blaine rolls closer, eyes losing teasing light and taking on a sharper, more interested focus.

“Kiss me,” Kurt begs lightly. Blaine’s lips are cold at first -- his skin everywhere they touch when Kurt scoots closer is cold. He shivers at the contact, then lets Blaine persuade him, with touch and tongue, onto his back. “Stay close,” he whispers when Blaine starts to move away.

“What do you want?” Blaine asks, the frank eye contact something he could only ever share with Kurt.

“I want you close,” Kurt’s body is trembling in a way he cannot hide or control. Blaine winds the fingers of one hand through Kurt’s and holds tight. “And I want you to kiss me.”

It’s harder, now, when he’s the focus. When he has to figure out how to let himself take and not think too hard about it and let himself be in the moment.

“Relax,” Blaine kisses his face and eyebrows, then the tips of his ears and bites at the tendon of his neck softly. His free hand measures the span of Kurt’s ribs and shapes the convex of his waist, flared from hip to ribs.

Kurt gasps sharply when Blaine takes his cock in hand, still hard but not right on the edge.

“Oh.” It’s different -- a different grip and differently shaped fingers, obviously. But it’s really different because it’s a touch that’s someone else’s and not his own, and it feels _so good_.

“Hold on,” Blaine wiggles away, leaving Kurt’s skin shocked in the lack of warmth to share, and when he comes back it’s with lube.

“How did you-” Kurt says

“You always kept it in the drawer by your bed at home, I figured-”

“You know where I keep my lube at home?” Kurt asks, scandalized.

“Kurt,” Blaine looks him in the eyes, “where is my lube?”

“Under your bed in a box,” he answers automatically. Blaine just raises an eyebrow.

“Point taken. You may proceed,” Kurt says. Blaine snorts out a laugh and then pours some lube into his hand.

It’s cold at first, which is actually helpful because it slows him down a fraction. Blaine gathers him close, as close as they can be, holding one of his hands right over Kurt’s thrumming heart. Blaine’s eyes remain steady on Kurt’s as he moves his hand slowly, warm slides and slippery touches that tease and tease and _god_ , Kurt loves it.

Blaine kisses him, shares his breath and it’s humid between their lips and bodies and Kurt’s arching a little into the touch now, whining, fingers digging into Blaine’s back.

“It’s so different than the way I-” he starts.

“Tell me how you like it.”

Kurt shakes his head. “No. I don’t want it like that.”

Blaine pauses.

“I want new,” Kurt opens his eyes and leans up, shudders when Blaine’s fist closes over the head of his straining dick. “Make it like nothing I’ve ever felt before.”

Blaine nods and nudges the side of Kurt’s cheek with his own. He circles his thumb around the ridged head of Kurt’s dick. “Like that?”

“Mmmm, yes,” Kurt throws his head back and moans, feeling every touch spark and skitter across his skin. Blaine’s hand rolls up, gently cupping the head of his cock, then letting it slide through the opening of his fist. His touch is heartbreakingly tender and those sparks flare brighter, lighting his skin and the bed and this room until Blaine’s worked from slow and intentional into something relentless, a pulsing beat that chases and chases and chases Kurt’s pleasure until he’s gasping and crying out and with a shocking slam into sensation, coming all over them both.

Blaine kisses and nuzzles, nudges him through the afterglow. His mouth is just on the roundest part of Kurt’s shoulder when he starts to feel capable of more than just breathing. He drapes a limp arm around Blaine and uses its weight to leverage Blaine closer.

“Hey,” Kurt says, then kisses him.

“Mm,” Blaine kisses back and then blinks sleepily at him.

“You are,” he stops to sigh. Looks up at Blaine’s hair, curling and wild. The hazing sex flush on his cheeks, strained by a wide smile. Feels the beat to beat of their hearts where their chests are pressed together, “the best friend I’ll ever have.”

Blaine looks at him for a long moment then smiles. “The best.”

He tucks his face into Kurt’s neck, half draped over him. Kurt feels the slow drag of sleep seducing him, the way his muscles start then relax, bit by bit until he’s heavier on Kurt’s body than he’s ever known him to be. It doesn’t take much convincing for Kurt to follow him down as well.

~*~

He wakes up too warm. Way too warm. After the first few bewildering moments of transition into wakefulness pass, he realizes it’s because Blaine is plastered all over him. That’s not that shocking, they’ve slept in the same bed many times.

Just never naked.

“Mmm, too early,” Blaine mumbles against him. Okay so maybe they’ve not slept this close before either. Cause their bodies, their _naked_ bodies, are skin to skin, inch by inch all over the place.

“ _Ohhh, so very naked,_ ” Kurt sings quietly to himself a little nervously.

Blaine sits up suddenly with a snuffling noise, looks down, then flops back. The sheet billows up then floats down.

“Oh my god,” Blaine starts to giggle, “we’re so naked.”

“Sh-shut up,” Kurt smacks his chest without even looking, beginning to laugh himself.

“Wow,” Blaine laughs harder, lifting the sheet quickly before Kurt can stop him.

“What are you _doing_?” Kurt squeals, pushing Blaine’s hands away and trying to cover himself.

“Uh, Kurt,” Blaine says, “I think it’s a little late for all that.”

“Blaine, I’m too naked for you to be this sassy. Stop it-” he slaps at Blaine’s hands again and then starts laughing when they get into a slap fight.

“Don’t worry Kurt, your twinkle tube is fantastic. You’ve nothing to hi-”

“That’s right,” Kurt puts the pillow he’d smacked Blaine in the face with down. “Now I’m going to try to get up with what’s left of my dignity and get dressed. Were you planning on staring at my ass while I do that too?”

“Naw,” Blaine yawns and scratches his belly, “the pants you wear? You might as well not be wearing anything. Been there, done that.”

Kurt rolls away to dangle his legs over the side of the bed. He’s still laughing when he hits Blaine with the pillow again.

~*~

“So how are you feeling?” Blaine settles next to Kurt on the couch. Kurt’s flipping through channels for something mindless to watch until Rachel gets home. They’re going on a day out to show Blaine their New York, but her rehearsal is running late and they swore they’d wait for her.

“Fine,” Kurt looks over. “Should this be more weird? It doesn’t feel weird.”

“I don’t know, I’ve never had sex with my best friend before.” Sarcasm is always hilarious on Blaine, he just can’t pull it off the way Kurt can. Kurt makes a haughty face.

“If you don’t want to have a serious conversation about this-” Kurt starts with his nose in the air.

“Okay, okay,” Blaine turns toward him and takes the remote out of his hand. Kurt knows that channel surfing makes Blaine crazy. Sometimes he does it _just_ to make Blaine crazy. He loves him, but needling him can be kind of fun.

“Being serious for a moment,” Kurt props his head on his elbow along the back of the couch, “I just don’t want this to become a thing that becomes a weird thing that snowballs and becomes a thing that ruins this.”

“Wow, that’s a lot of things,” Blaine laughs. “You said it doesn’t feel weird right? Why borrow trouble?”

Kurt bites back a sigh. Blaine’s always been a champ at avoidance.

“Blaine, are we going to be okay?”

“Kurt,” Blaine’s hand on his knee is centering. “ _I_ think we are.”

They’re quiet for a while, and Kurt lets himself think, really think in detail (which he’s been avoiding).

“Thank you, by the way,” Kurt says. “You -- you really made that special. I’m…” he feels suddenly shy, “I’m so glad it was you.”

Blaine smiles and scoots closer, then snuggles against him, something Kurt doesn’t normally let him do unless he can tell Blaine’s particularly touch starved. Today, he wants it too. He doesn’t necessarily feel the need for more (although, yeah _wow_ sex is amazing and Kurt totally gets what his dad meant about what happens once you start having it), but he _does_ want to keep sharing the new closeness with Blaine. What Blaine gave him last night was such a precious gift.

He kisses the top of Blaine’s head and smiles into his hair. Blaine settles on the Food Network then tosses the remote aside.


	4. Chapter 4

“Oh Lady, if you think you’re hiding it, you are _delusional_ ,” Santana says between shoveling bites of mashed potatoes into her mouth a few days later.

“Hiding what? I told you I’d share the chocolate.” _Only because you found it_. He’ll have to find a new hiding spot.

“Please. You got laid. You got your precious, lilly white ass _laid_. I can smell it all over you, and not in the good dirty sex kind of way, but in the vomiting rainbows beautiful first time loving touch kind of way.” She tries to say it sarcastically but there’s a small smile on her lips. She fills her mouth with more food.

 _How does she know?_ Kurt thinks in dismay.

“Psychic third eye,” she taps her forehead.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he says coolly.

“Bullshit. What I want to know is how you managed to sneak it in while Blaine was here. Did he aid and abet?

Kurt tries so hard not to blush he might be hurting himself.

“Oh my god,” Santana’s fork clatters on the plate, “Shut up. _Shut. Up_.”

“You shut up,” he hisses.

“Just how dumb are you? Oh my god, I knew you were hard up but really?”

“Don’t you dare judge me, you know nothing about this, and I suggest you back your ass out of my personal life.”

“Hummel,” she says seriously, “he’s your best friend. This could fuck everything up. Why not do it with the British guy? I can’t believe he hasn’t sweet-talked you out of your panties with that accent of his already.”

He knows her well enough to know she won’t let up.

“Look,” he’d rather get this conversation done before Rachel gets home. He doesn’t have secrets from Rachel but he’s far from ready to deal with her reaction, “I just...I know you think it’s dumb but I wanted it to be special. I- I like Adam but it just wasn’t...right.”

He thinks of what it felt like to shudder into pleasure against a warm body. “At least not before.”

“Let me guess, Anderson offered to pop your cherry for the greater good.”

“I don’t think I can explain this to you Santana,” Kurt pokes at his mashed potatoes, making fork patterns in the small pile.

“Are things weird now?” she says with a frown. “Do you regret it?”

“Not for a second. They’re not weird at all, they’re...it’s like back to usual, only I know him better now.”

Santana thinks about this for a bit, then shrugs. “Whatever. Just don’t come crying to me when this blows up in your face,” she smirks. “Unless he blows it all over your face, ‘cause then I’ll know the world is ending since you let that all over your skin.”

“God you’re crass,” Kurt shudders. Thankfully, before the conversation can take a more horrifying turn, Rachel chooses this moment to come home.

~*~

“How’s school?” Kurt adjusts his monitor so Blaine has a better view of him. Skyping can be hard because Kurt’s always tempted to check his angles rather than focus on Blaine’s face. Blaine always catches him and teases him about it.

“Fine,” Blaine’s averted eyes are an immediate tell.

“It’s almost graduation time,” Kurt soothes, “you’ll be moving out here in no time.” School has been hard for Blaine, what with most of his friends having already graduated.

“I know. It’s just been a week. Mom had to go on a trip.”

“Ohhh awkward dinners with your dad, hmm?”

“To say the least. It’s so much weirder when he tries.”

“You can always go visit my dad you know,” Kurt says.

“I know. I think I’m gonna go by the tire shop tomorrow. But anyway,” Blaine changes the subject and waggles his eyebrows, “don’t you have a date with Adam tonight?”

“Yeah, he bought us tickets to a show,” Kurt smiles brightly.

“Oooh romantic. And after?”

Kurt pretends to misunderstand the question, “Dinner probably.”

“Ku-urt,” Blaine wheedles.

“Okay, okay. I think maybe? I feel better about the whole thing, and I kind of really want to. I mean I wanted to before,” he babbles, “but now I feel so much less nervous about it and I _really_ want to.”

“Well, good luck. Go get ‘em tiger,” Blaine says and Kurt laughs.

“I thought I told you to never say that again. Anyway, how’s Sebastian? You’ve been silent on the topic. Are things still going well?”

“Um,” Blaine shrugs, “good I guess. We haven’t been out lately, we’re both-- busy right now with midterms.”

“Blaine, seriously, are you okay?” Kurt asks.

“Yeah, I promise I am,” Blaine smiles. “I’m tired and you know how I get.”

“Okay,” Kurt says doubtfully.

“I promise. Now are we gonna watch Golden Girls or not? Because my dad totally side-eyed me over all the episodes on the DVR.” Blaine shuffles onto his bed.

“I’m queued and ready to go. Wait! Popcorn. Want some?”

“Naw we’re out. I have Skittles.”

Kurt carries Blaine into the kitchen with him. “You know those are terrible for your teeth.”

“Yes well your judgment is bad for my soul,” Blaine jokes. “And your bitch face is probably going to give you premature wrinkles.”

“I’m choosing to ignore that for the sake of our friendship,” Kurt gets the popcorn ready and smiles at Blaine anyway.

~*~

“So when do you land?” Blaine is typing and talking. Kurt’s a few feet away from his computer, pinning a scrap to his jacket in progress. He spins the mannequin toward the screen.

“What do you think, too much?”

Blaine looks up and considers for a minute. “Maybe? I guess it depends on how you’d accessorize it. Less would definitely be more there.”

“Yeah,” Kurt looks at it again and shrugs. He’ll have to think on it. He has packing to do anyway. “Five,” he answers Blaine’s previous question.

“Is your Dad picking you up? I could if you need.”

“Yeah he is,” Kurt shoots him an apologetic look. “But he did say he’d love to have you for dinner.”

“Oh an invitation to the exclusive _Friday Night Dinner,_ ” Blaine’s jazz hands make Kurt laugh. “I’d love to.”

~*~

“It’s too bad we can’t do double date things,” Kurt licks a drip from his ice cream before it can get too far.

“I don’t know,” Blaine says, kicking at the ground.

“Things not going well?” Kurt guesses. Blaine hasn’t talked about Sebastian much lately.

“I don’t know. No? He’s...I know he went to Scandals the other day, I heard about it. I know it was just a hookup sort of thing. But we used to do things and now I kind of feel like-”

“Does it bother you - the other guys?” Kurt says gently when the silence stretches.

“No, not really,” Blaine shrugs. “I don’t want him to be my boyfriend. He just worked really hard at first and now...what if I’m just a convenience?”

“So why do you do it?”

“He’s very convincing,” Blaine laughs. “It’s nice not to be alone.”

Kurt resists the urge to give him part of his father’s speech. It’s not really his business to lecture Blaine, even when he really wants to sometimes. He doesn’t always think that Blaine acts in his own best interest and worries that Blaine does things that don’t always make him feel good. But he understands being lonely. He’s not in New York like Kurt, and thinks are so different here.

“Don’t frown, you’ll get old too soon,” Blaine jostles him with his shoulder and they keep walking. “It’s not that bad. I’m just feeling insecure. He’s really actually great. And, well you know,” he half smiles, “great, if you know what I mean.”

“That’s enough detail,” Kurt laughs. “Take care of yourself. Be safe.”

“Thanks Mom,” Blaine finishes off his ice cream and throws away the cone in the first garbage can they see. Kurt’s asked him why he gets a cone when he won’t eat it, but Blaine just says it’s more fun. “I don’t need the condom speech from you. If I remember correctly, I’m the one who tried to give it to you first.”

Kurt shudders at the memory, then thinks of how far he’s come from his younger self.

“Want to watch a movie tonight?” he asks suddenly. He’s only home for a bit and he wants to spend as much time with Blaine as he can pack in.

“Only if I get to pick.”

“Oh no, you picked last time, my turn.”

“Okay then,” Blaine concedes with a sigh, “can I get veto power?”

Kurt pretends to think it over. “Only once.”

“God you’re strict.”

“You love it,” Kurt says surely and smiles at him.

~*~

“Ugh.”

“Stop complaining,” Kurt knocks his ankle off of Blaine’s. “You vetoed already.”

“I didn’t realize you would count all five movies separately. I vetoed Twiliight.”

“You did my friend,” Kurt smiles smugly. “If you wanted to veto the franchise, you should have been more specific.”

“New Moon is the worst of them all. It’s depressing,” Blaine complains.

“Shhhh,” Kurt sits up and smacks Blaine’s shoulder blade absently, “it’s the best part, he’s about to take off his shirt.”

He registers Blaine burying his face in the pillow and groaning but ignores him in favor of Taylor Lautner’s impressive, impressive abs. “Oh my.”

“That’s actually kind of hot,” Blaine says.

“I know, isn’t he incredible?” Kurt keeps his eyes on the screen.

“Actually,” Blaine laughs, “I meant you.”

“What?” That gets his attention.

“You know, ogling.” Blaine wiggles his fingers. Blaine’s hair is a little flat and his cheeks are pink. The first two buttons of his shirt have been popped and the lights from the movie flicker over his skin and for a moment Kurt has a flash of Blaine in bed with him a few months ago, shirtless and a little sweaty and smiling. He clears his throat. Apparently Taylor Lautner’s abs are exceedingly potent tonight.

“Me, ogling?”

Blaine squeezes his knee and Kurt feels the touch like a flash all through his body. “It’s like a whole new Kurt Hummel.”

“I’ll have you know I’ve always had a healthy appreciation for the male physique.”

“Kurt, that’s not appreciation I’m seeing. That’s you being horny.”

“Well, you know. Things were always kind of...vague, before. Like, I knew what I wanted to do, and hey, that’s a hot guy to look at, and that all sounds lovely let’s put all of it together and so yes, I liked it. But now-”

“But now that you have _insider information_ ,” Blaine waggles his eyebrows, “you _really_ like it.”

Kurt sucumbs to helpless laughter. “Oh god, the lines you come up with Blaine.”

Blaine throws his head back and laughs and all Kurt sees is the line of his throat.

~*~

Kurt walks Blaine out, calm on the surface even through the gentle hug Blaine gives him and the dizzying scent of raspberries so close when they touch. He shuts the door quietly and says goodnight to his father, then climbs up the stairs at a sedate pace. He’s so worked up that by the time he gets to his room, he doesn’t even make it to the bed, just spits in his hand and fists himself quickly, biting his other hand to keep himself quiet. He comes in seconds.

He has plans tomorrow with Blaine, a coffee date with the girls and then a marathon tv night before he has to fly back to New York. He has no idea how he’ll make it through any of that. Not if tonight is any indication. It was around the fourth casual touch that had set his skin on fire that had Kurt starting to question the wisdom of their one time only agreement. Still gasping from his orgasm, sweating and sticky and loose limbed on his bed, Kurt’s realizes that he’s done questioning it. He’s not sure it’s the wisest choice, but come tomorrow, he’s determined that he’s going get into that boy’s pants again.

When he wakes the next day, even the tiny bit of doubt is gone. All that’s left is a warm glow of anticipation and Kurt’s trademark determination to make the things he wants to happen, happen.

~*~

“Kurt,” Blaine laughs behind him, dismayed. Kurt thanks the barista as she hands him coffee.

“What?”

“Those pants,” Blaine reaches a hand out to help Kurt balance the tray of drinks they’re bringing to the girls.

“These pants?” Kurt looks down like he has no idea what Blaine is referring to.

“They’re practically criminal they’re so tight,” Blaine raises his eyebrows. “Are you sure you’re not damaging anything in them?” he teases.

“Shut it Anderson,” Kurt smirks. “You just wish your ass looked this good.”

Blaine laughs. “Or something.”

~*~

“ _Kurt_ ,” Blaine sounds a little plaintive when he says it, out of nowhere.

Kurt looks over his shoulder to where Blaine is sitting with his head propped up against the headboard. He’s spent the day teasing Blaine in increments. The pants, the little touches that could wholly be construed as innocent but really weren’t. Leaning in just a little closer than necessary to whisper gossip into his ear over coffee. Kurt’s worked Blaine all day, rewarded by little shivers and bitten lips and eyes that just couldn’t stay away. By the time they’d settled in to watch their show he’d had to lay on his stomach -- not only to show off his assets, but to hide his arousal too.

“My feet bothering you?” he swings them around a bit, crossed at the ankle in the air. Blaine’s eyes are definitely not on his feet. Kurt smirks, sensing that Blaine is about ready to crack.

“Not as much as your ass,” Blaine tries to sound like he’s making a joke.

“Ohhhh,” Kurt turns a little, feeling flirty and fun. “Too much for you to handle?”

“Shut up. I’m here on your ass’s behalf. I think it’s begging you to let it out.”

“Well that’s quite the romantic proposition,” Kurt sits and settles next to Blaine at the headboard.

“It wasn’t a proposition,” Blaine blurts out. It’s obvious it was, from the high color on his cheeks to his clenching fingers. Kurt holds his gaze for a second, just long enough of a look to level honesty without words that they both acknowledge.

Kurt hums lightly. Blaine smiles a little shyly and looks away. Kurt doesn’t say anything further, just turns back to the tv and lets the tension between them build. They’re having a near silent conversation that feels like some sexy game of cat and mouse.

“You know,” there’s something about Blaine like this -- the new way they know each other and how sure of their connection he is -- that makes Kurt feel bold and a little daring, “your pants seems pretty tight too. Are you sure it’s not your ass,” he turns to whisper teasingly into Blaine’s ear, “that’s _begging_ to be let out?”

“Hm,” is all Blaine manages. Kurt turns toward him more fully. It’s like flipping a switch, from seeing Blaine as his best friend to this man before him who breathes sensuality and whose body makes Kurt’s beg to touch.

“Well?” he prompts gently, but lets his finger -- the edge of his thumb sliding up the line of Blaine’s thigh -- do the real asking.

“What’s gotten into you?” Blaine starts then gasps when Kurt slips his hand sure and strong around that thigh and presses his fingers into the crease of his groin. It’s more than suggestion this time, it’s invitation.

“You’ve been checking me out all day. It turns me on. You turn me on.” Kurt’s still speaking low into Blaine’s ear, feeding off the heat of his breath and Blaine’s skin. He tries to judge if Blaine is really on board, kissing his ear and just below. Blaine shudders. It’s definitely not a no, and neither is the way he shifts to spread his legs just the tiniest bit. He turns toward Kurt.

“So what is this,” his eyes flicker down to Kurt’s and he smiles, “a bros helping bros thing?”

Kurt laughs. “Can’t a guy just want to jerk you off?”

He puts his free hand against Blaine’s cheek to direct his mouth toward him. Kurt nips in, licks and kisses and slips his tongue between Blaine’s lips, catches his exhaled whimper of surprise, and then covers Blaine’s erection with the cupped palm of his hand. Blaine turns toward him more fully with a little groan and Kurt fumbles to undo his belt as fast as possible. He wastes no time in taking Blaine’s dick out, biting his lip when he has it in his hand, hard and red and mouthwatering in front of him. He twists his hand slowly, enjoying the way it throbs, the slide of skin over the steel of muscle under. The way Blaine groans and grinds his forehead harder into his shoulder.

“Oh god Kurt,” Blaine manages, kissing at his neck in sloppy patterns. He puts one warm hand between Kurt’s thighs and the searing heat of his touch seeps through the material of his pants. Kurt breaks away to climb between Blaine’s knees, leaning forward to keep their mouths together.

“How do you feel about reciprocity? Namely, naked reciprocity.” Blaine asks with a teasing smile a few minutes later.

“Big fan,” Kurt admits, grabbing Blaine behind the knees and pulling him farther down til he’s flat on the bed. He tugs and manipulates Blaine’s pants until he’s fully divested of them, then runs his hands appreciatively up his legs.

“I suppose I’d have to use a condom if I wanted to blow you right now?”

“I would think it prudent?” Blaine manages, as Kurt’s resumes his ministrations, only more teasingly, using light fingers to trace the ridges and veins of his dick, around his balls, the apex of his spread thighs.

“We can do something else though right?” Kurt pulls away to rifle under Blaine’s bed. “I don’t know why, but you just seem like a ‘within nearest grabbing distance’ sort of guy when it comes to jerking off. One day you’ll have to explain why you keep it under here. But for now-” Kurt examines the lube and then pops it open.

“Not so fast,” Blaine takes it away. “We were just talking the talk about reciprocity right? Take your pants off.”

On his knees, Kurt just stares him down.

“Not only am I not fooled by or impressed by your bitchface right now,” Blaine rubs his thumbs over the bulge in Kurt’s pants, “but I really want to get you naked. Do I need to say please? I’m totally willing to beg a little for it.” Kurt puts a hand over Blaine’s, pressing his hand against his throbbing cock.

“Please Kurt,” Blaine looks up at him under his lashes, seductive and low voiced, sensual in a way that makes Kurt feel senseless and needful, “let me see you.”

Shivers course up his body. Kurt takes a deep breath and begins to unbutton his shirt slowly, watching Blaine’s eyes on him. Once unbuttoned, he lets the ends hang free. Exhales and watches Blaine’s hands skim up his sides under his undershirt and bites on his lip when those strong hands curl around his waist to pull him closer. Blaine’s mouth sears like branding against this lower belly, his tongue a tease. Blaine’s hands work fast to get him unbuckled and unzipped and it’s with very little grace that together they get his clothes removed. Kurt pulls at the shoulders of Blaine’s polo until that too is gone.

“God your body,” Kurt says breathlessly, appreciating every bit of it with his eyes and hands.

“No but, really, lets talk about yours for a second Kurt, _wow_.”

Kurt laughs. “Okay, noted. We think we’re hot. Excellent,” he pushes Blaine back down so he’s under him. Grinds against him lightly. “Can I have the lube now?”

“Bossy,” Blaine says in a sassy little voice that goes straight through Kurt’s stupidly lust twisted stomach and into his cock.

Kurt takes the lube handed him and pours some into his hand, then dribbles some onto Blaine, fisting them both by turns slowly until their cocks are wet and squelching with the tight grip and pump of his fist. He maintains eye contact with Blaine, and there is something about how frank their looks are that makes his stomach twist deliciously. He can’t tell what Blaine likes more -- when he touches himself, or when Kurt’s hand is certain and brazen on his cock.

“You’re far from the blushing virgin I deflowered a few months ago,” Blaine manages to note with awe while also managing to poke fun at him.

“What can I say? You introduced me to the joys of sex. I like having it,” Kurt rubs the pad of his thumb against Blaine’s frenulum. “Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to focus and keep having it, with you.”

“I-is that your way of telling me to shut up?” Blaine gasps.

“Shut up and kiss me,” Kurt leans in and gets the kiss he’s asking for, tongue wicked in Blaine’s eager mouth. Blaine goes with it, lets Kurt take and plunder and rolls his hips into Kurt’s touch. They break and Kurt searches for the best rhythm for them, their cocks catching and sliding against each other and their stomachs. It’s frustrating, maddeningly imperfect but also like lightning, hot and bright erratic and they chase it, moving and gasping against each other.

Blaine opens his legs wider, dropping his knees down to let Kurt really fall between them, grabbing Kurt’s ass to haul him closer. Like this, completely plastered together, their cocks are trapped in the wet space between their bellies and everything is some sort of friction. But it’s Blaine gasping and starting to sweat and grunting a little -- Blaine undone in ways he’d never dreamt of seeing him, that has Kurt’s body chasing the boom of thunder that pairs a lighting storm.

Blaine’s hands are soft but sure on his ass, fingers tracing the crease where it meets his thigh, back and then forth and then back toward the heat between Kurt’s legs. Blaine pulls him even closer and his fingers slip up his crack a bit.

“Oh fuck, yeah,” Kurt grinds out and feels himself _throb_ and so must Blaine because he does it again, this time pressing hard against his hole. Kurt’s completely unprepared for how quickly his pleasure crests. He comes with a shout that he tries to muffle by biting Blaine’s collarbone, throbbing from his toes to his calves and into his pelvis.

When he opens his eyes Blaine is so beautiful, high color cheeked and blown eyes and damp skinned. He’s biting his lip and whining a bit.

“Here,” Kurt manages to coordinate himself on shaking arms, gets one hand nice and sloppy with his own come and remaining lube and starts to jerk Blaine off.

“Slow and hard grip,” Blaine grits out, and a few strokes in, comes between them.

Their kisses are barely kisses, they’re still coming down and really only managing to breathe against each other’s mouths. They come down from orgasm slowly, bodies and hearts and kisses slowing until all that’s left are pecks that speak of tiredness and affection.

Blaine gets up and goes into the bathroom to clean up, leaving the door open. Kurt watches idly, taking in the lines of Blaine’s body. He lets himself see Blaine as a whole in an appreciative way for the first time outside the heat of the moment. Blaine’s body has, for the most part, not been a mystery in their years of friendship.

But in the last years, it’s changed. There’s a definition to his muscles that wasn’t there before that he’s sure has everything to do with Blaine’s increased attention to boxing. A ripple of muscle along his back that makes Kurt’s mouth water a little. Makes him want more.

Blaine flops onto the bed, giving Kurt a wet cloth. Kurt rolls up onto his side, unembarrassed to be naked, just sleepy and warm.

“At the risk of being that guy who asks questions and ruins things...what are we doing here Kurt?”

Kurt opens his eyes. “Are you upset?” There’s nothing facetious about the question, only genuine concern.

“No. But I...I mean this is a little more than me wanting you to have a first time you always wanted. I loved this, it was hot and all. But I want to be sure we’re on the same page.”

“You’re my best friend,” Kurt says simply. “Now you’re my best friend I get off with sometimes. I mean...I'm okay with that if you are.”

“Getting off with you is pretty fantastic,” Blaine admits, rolling onto his back. Kurt curls in closer, then puts his head on Blaine’s chest. Blaine loves snuggles and apparently, post-sex, Kurt is a snuggler. Everybody wins.

“We don’t have to make a thing about it if we don’t want to?” Kurt says softly.

Blaine yawns and puts his arm around Kurt’s waist. “Sounds perfect.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to add on AO3 when I posted that the title of the fic comes from the Jason Derulo song, The Other Side :D

The movie is over and they’re still sleepily entwined -- Kurt’s been drifting in and out of sleep actually -- when Blaine speaks up hesitantly.

“So...you liked that?”

“I should think that was apparent?” Kurt asks, confused.

“Not the sex,” Blaine drums his fingers nervously on Kurt’s stomach. He puts his hand over Blaine’s because it tickles. “The thing with- um… my fingers and-”

“Blaine Anderson,” Kurt pulls away, leaving Blaine laying on the pillow under him. He’s lax and sweetly undone, “are you blushing?”

“I just-” Blaine looks away and Kurt takes pity on him.

“I did. I mean...I didn’t think- it hadn’t occurred to me it _would_.”

“You haven’t done that before?”

“You might want to define what _that_ is,” Kurt sighs, admitting, “never mind, it doesn’t matter how you define it. No nothing like that.”

“Not even alone?”

Kurt’s curiosity is getting the better of him. “No I never really wanted to? It seemed weird to do it by myself. I just figured when the time came, if I felt like...experimenting,” he shrugs his shoulders to emphasize the words, “I’d try it with someone. Why the questions though?” He tries to be gentle with his words, because there’s definitely something vulnerable in the tone of Blaine’s voice and his body. He looks smaller than usual, and younger.

“I tried it with Sebastian.” Blaine admits.

“Didn’t go that well?” Kurt guesses softly.

“I wanted it to. But...it was just kind of weird?” Blaine makes a face. “I guess it’s kind of my fault, I tried to power through and then it just...hurt.”

“Oh,” Kurt puts his hand on Blaine’s chest.

“I mean, Sebastian was really good about it, we stopped and it was fine...I mean I ended up kind of just taking care of him. Buzzkill for me,” he jokes feebly.

 _I’m glad Sebastian was kind,_ Kurt thinks. “You seem upset about the whole thing though,” he observes.

“I don’t know. I thought I’d -- I mean I like it...by myself. I don’t know why-”

“Well you don’t have to pressure yourself honey.” The endearment slips out before he can stop it, but it doesn’t seem to give Blaine any pause. “Maybe you just weren’t comfortable enough yet? Ready?” he suggests it hesitantly. Of the two of them, Blaine’s always been the more ready, the more excited and open to sexual adventure, so to speak.

“I just...I don’t want to disappoint him...if it were to come up again.”

“Because you don’t want to?” Kurt asks.

“Not really. At least not now. Not the way it-” Blaine shrugs.

Kurt lays back down, head on his own pillow facing Blaine. They don’t talk for a while.

“Is it weird?” Blaine asks. “I’m basically asking you for advice about having sex with another guy when I’m with you...naked...after having sex.”

Kurt thinks about it for a while. “I guess- I don’t know. This-,” he gestures between them, “isn’t something I saw coming, or would know how to plan for… or that I ever saw myself doing. But it doesn’t feel weird.”

“No,” Blaine puts his hand on Kurt’s waist, and he snuggles into the pillow a bit more.

“As long as you’re happy Blaine,” Kurt whispers.

“Are you?” Blaine blinks, sleepy and slow.

“Yes,” Kurt says, then closes his eyes.

~*~

“He wore the beanie again,” Kurt complains. Blaine laughs, scrunching his nose.

“To the theater?”

“And he didn’t take it off!” Kurt says, “God only knows what kind of hair he was hiding under there. I thought it was just a cute fashion statement when we first met, but he keeps wearing them, and the last time I got it off of him-”

“You mean got him off?” Blaine kids, winking at him.

“Well yeah,” Kurt waves a dismissing hand, “that too. But anyway, his hair! Oh, talk about a mess. It was almost a big enough turn off to put the brakes on completely.”

“Thank god it was only an almost,” Blaine says sarcastically.

“Seriously,” Kurt deadpans.

“Maybe mention to him that you aren’t a fan?” Blaine suggests.

“Yeah. I haven’t seen him since.”

“Oh, how come?” Blaine’s moving around his room; Kurt sees the flash of his photocollage then the striped wood of his headboard.

“Bed early?” he asks. Blaine yawns and nods.

“Anyway,” Kurt continues, “just crossed schedules I guess.”

“You don’t seem that enthusiastic, if you don’t mind me pointing out.”

Kurt plays with the hem of his black shirt and thinks about it. “I’m not _not_ enthusiastic,” he starts. “I guess I’m just busy and it’s not been my first priority.”

“But you still like him?”

“Yes,” Kurt says decisively. “He’s kind, and a gentleman, he makes me laugh and we harmonize beautifully.”

“Well, there’s a winning reason,” Blaine says and Kurt laughs.

“But-” Kurt stops to think.

“But?”

_But there’s something missing._

He bites his tongue and shrugs, feeling a bit wistful and melancholy. “I don’t know.”

~*~

“I got your package,” Blaine’s breathless voice comes through the phone.

“Oh, and?” Kurt puts the phone between his shoulder and ear, tying his apron on.

“Where did you get them? They’re beautiful!”

Kurt smiles, “I made them for you.”

“ _Kurt,_ ” Blaine’s voice is rich with affection. “That must have taken you so long.”

“I saw the fabrics and thought of you. Someone’s got to feed that bowtie addiction.”

“Well,” Blaine clears his throat. “I’m glad you’re here to see to my needs.”

“Oh well then,” Kurt feels a little breathless at the implied suggestion.

“Anyway,” Blaine says, “I know you have to work. But I’ll see you soon enough, right?”

“Next Wednesday. I can’t wait for you to see the diner. And hear the band sing! We’re having a rehearsal that Thursday is that okay?”

“Are you kidding?” Blaine sounds positively giddy. “I can’t wait!”

“ _And_ , I have managed to procure the Gilmore Girls boxed set on ebay for a steal,” Kurt gives Gunther a _look_ to indicate that he’s coming when he clears his throat pointedly at Kurt. “So I figured we could force everyone to watch and have a massive marathon.”

“Sounds fantastic. I can’t wait.”

Kurt reciprocates and hangs up, ignoring Gunther’s annoyed _hrmph_ of displeasure.

~*~

“So this is the famous Blaine,” Adam says brightly.

“The one and only,” Kurt bounces up on his toes, excited they’re finally meeting each other.

“And this is Adam!” Blaine puts his hand out to shake Adam’s enthusiastically.

“Yes,” Kurt has his hands clasped together in front of his chest.

“And this-” Santana butts in from the couch behind them, “is the most awkwardly chipper meeting ever.”

“Santana!” Blaine steps further in and heads over to the couch, knocking his knee against hers until she pretends to give in with an eyeroll before standing up to hug him.

“You only get 15 minutes of shower time a day short stack,” she crosses her arms. “There’s too many people up in here for anyone to wait around that long.”

“Fifteen minutes, gotcha,” he says, winking back at Kurt with an exaggerated expression of goodwill, which makes Kurt sigh with fond exasperation.

“So,” Adam surprises Kurt by taking his hand, “we’re staying in tonight?”

“Yeah,” Kurt says as he squeezes Adam’s fingers, “flying always tires Blaine out, we’ll go out tomorrow right?”

“Yes. I tend to be a stick in the mud once you get me off a plane. Must be all the recirculated air.”

“I hate flying,” Adam lets Kurt lead him to the couch, settling next to him after moving a throw pillow to the side. “But I only really travel when I’m going home.”

“Much longer flight,” Blaine says in affable agreement.

“So,” Santana turns toward them brightly, sitting on the Cadillac chair where Blaine had been about to sit. “Who is excited for this fantastic night of ridiculously sappy and cliche-ridden television?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t love Gilmore Girls,” Blaine says, sitting on the opposite side of the couch from Adam. “I know you cried last time you watched during Rory’s graduation speech.”

Kurt extricates his hand from Adam’s grip. “I’m going to get go drinks and an assortment of finger foods. Santana’s going to get the show set up, aren’t you?”

“Yes, please Kurt, leave me alone to buffer the tension,” Santana mutters as Kurt backs out of the room. Once in the little kitchen he rolls back his shoulders and ignores how weirdly awkward this is. Damn Santana for making it so obvious. He shakes his head to clear it. He’s not doing anything wrong, it’s just...weird. To have Blaine and Adam in the same space.

~*~

“It was lovely to have you over,” Kurt holds both of Adam’s hands by the door.

“It was fun,” Adam smiles, then waves at Blaine and Santana. “It was nice to see you Santana. Lovely to meet you Blaine.”

“Likewise,” Blaine gives Kurt a look that Kurt can clearly reads as ( _take your time_ ). “I’ll go get ready for bed then.”

He kicks Santana’s shin lightly on his way out to get her moving, then disappears behind the curtain to Kurt’s room.

“So,” Kurt turns his attention back to Adam, swinging their hands a bit.

“Kurt-” Adam says, “is he- is he sleeping in your room?”

“Yeah, of course,” Kurt is surprised by the question. “Why?”

“Don’t you- doesn’t that seem a bit strange?”

“Why would it be?” Kurt asks, puzzled.

“I mean -- I know we’re not exclusive, but I am right here,” Adam is staring at him like he doesn’t quite know what to say. Kurt swallows the guilt that tries to rise in his throat. He doesn’t have anything to feel guilty about. They aren’t exclusive and regardless, it’s Blaine. Blaine has shared his bed every time they’ve had a sleepover since he was 16. He says as much to Adam.

“Okay,” Adam looks a little doubtful. “Well….that’s a perfect segway anyway,” he gives Kurt a small kiss then smiles. “This might seem like strange timing, and I swear I was going to ask anyway-”

“Adam,” Kurt interrupts him with a smile, “are you nervous?”

“Shush,” Adam kisses him again, lingering over it. “You don’t have to answer right away, but I was thinking...maybe you’d want to make this a sort of more exclusive thing?” he says then smiles, bashful and adorable and so handsome and Kurt...doesn’t know what to say.

“Oh! Um-” He struggles for a moment.

“Just-” Adam clears his throat after a few beats, “why don’t you think about it, and we’ll talk later okay?”

“Okay,” Kurt kisses him on the cheek then lets Adam through the door, trying to pull himself together. “I’ll call you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Adam leaves with a small look of disappointment, and Kurt bites his lip. He leans against the door after he’s shut it. He likes Adam, and he’s never had a true boyfriend. On paper, shouldn’t he jump at this chance? Yes, Adam’s penchant for beanies is a little upsetting, and maybe things weren’t as exciting as they’d been at first when everything had felt so new for a boy just out of Ohio.

“Everything alright?” Blaine’s sitting crosslegged on the bed, face scrubbed bright, when Kurt twitches back the curtain. Ender’s Game is open on his lap.

And then, there’s this. He’d have to give up what he’s doing with Blaine. Which shouldn't even be a consideration because he’s not dating Blaine. He _is_ dating Adam though. Kurt feels confused, conflicted even though there’s not supposed to be a conflict here.

“Sure,” Kurt pulls out a soft shirt and flannel pants. “Just tired.”

~*~

It’s dark but not quiet. Even though his back is turned to Blaine, Kurt can tell by the sound of his breathing that he isn’t asleep. For once they hadn’t fallen asleep talking into the dark the way they usually do, finding one thing after another to discuss.

Maybe Adam was right, maybe this _is_ strange because it feels...weird. Only not weird exactly but...fraught. He can hear each of Blaine’s breaths and his body is so close, warm and it makes Kurt tingle and feel a little short circuited. Knowing he probably shouldn’t, he rolls over slowly.

“Can’t sleep?” Blaine whispers.

“No,” Kurt closes his eyes for a few beats, then opens them. The city moves and its pulse is a steady drumming against the windows. In the dark Blaine is little more than a shadow, but he is like the north drawing a compass needle and Kurt has to scoot closer.

“Blaine,” he breathes out and then bites his lip to keep from saying more. Sleeping with Blaine right now wouldn’t be just bros helping bros, not when Kurt’s sent Adam off with a small kiss but feels hungry for Blaine’s touch.

“I know,” Blaine whispers back, “I know we shouldn’t.”

It’s the first time either of them has said it, and it’s the first time Kurt’s ever really thought that maybe this isn’t right. But it doesn’t feel wrong, not in his bones when he breathes in Blaine’s raspberry sweet smell.

“You’re my best friend,” Kurt says it like a reason not to. He’s been saying it all along, only it seems to mean something a little different every time. Kurt feels Blaine’s body move a little closer, and his hand is a warm shock against Kurt’s hip, then a hot thrill spears through him when Blaine’s thumb slips under the hem of his shirt. “Blaine-” he breaks off and pulls Blaine in, one arm around his waist strong and he’s gasping into the kiss, their mouths already open and wet and ready. They break away and breathe heavily for a moment, until Kurt gathers his courage, looking Blaine in the eye as much as he can in the dark. Takes Blaine’s hand and holds it to his own skin, running up it his torso, rucking up his sleep shirt along the way. Kurt takes Blaine’s thumb and uses it to press it against his own nipple. “I think that,” he says low, then pinches the flesh of Blaine’s thumb to get the point across, “we _should._ ”

Blaine catches him into a kiss then, almost moaning and under Kurt’s shirt he rolls his finger against Kurt’s nipple, then uses the edge of a nail and scrapes across it. Kurt jerks a little and has to snap his lips together to keep from crying out.

“Come here,” he manages. Blaine’s hand treads away from his nipple.

Kurt feels Blaine, somehow, deep inside him already, like Blaine is in his blood, in the marrow of his bones, electric and glowing. It’s familiar already, their lips moving in desperate kisses. They’ve done this enough that Kurt knows which way Blaine tilts his head, knows he’ll gasp too loudly when Blaine breaks away to suck kisses down his throat, knows to clamp down his own urge to moan when Blaine rolls over him in the dark.

“I don’t want-” he breaks off, then uses his hand to guide Blaine’s mouth back up to his.

“You don’t want to?” Blaine pulls away a bit before Kurt can kiss him.

“N-no, I do!” Kurt exhales and blinks. Wishes he could see Baine more clearly. “I was going to say, I don’t want to stop.”

“Oh,” Kurt can hear the pleased smile in Blaine’s voice, “okay then. Let’s not stop.”

“You’ll have to be quiet.” Kurt says low, into Blaine’s ear.

“Me?” Blaine says, “You’re the one who makes all the noise.”

“No-” Kurt giggles and Blaine shushes him before covering his mouth with more kisses. Kurt exhales into them, letting his body melt back into the bedding, feeling Blaine all around him, all over him, this small weight that’s compact and so grounding.

“Quiet,” he breaks away to say, but it’s not a reminder, it’s a challenge.

They move slowly, peeling each other out of clothing while making as little noise as possible. They soften into kisses, luxuriant kisses that feel like connection, that feel like Blaine’s touching him everywhere, even though they’re not fully undressed. Somewhere in his chest there’s a flutter, deep and aching and sure; it’s unsettling and satisfying at the same time.

Kurt kisses and kisses Blaine like he’s air. They barely move against each other even though they’re both hard. Instead they curl together, fingers in hair and palms on cheeks and kisses, so many kisses - long and light, near silent laughing at one point, and then every now and then kisses that hurt in a good way, cutting straight to that fluttering in his chest.

It’s the hush around them keeping secrets, it’s the wide dark of night that bonds them to anonymity, and it’s their desire to keep it that creates a cocoon around them. Where in the darkest spaces in the quietest room, they can come together and burn so brightly, flash hot and aching, only known to themselves.

It’s the hush around them that protects. Nothing else can touch them in this dark. Can’t touch what they have.

Then they’re naked. Kurt’s palm is a little sweaty where it’s traveling Blaine’s body, and his own body is shaking just a little from the intensity of his feelings. Blaine’s hips are a little more pronounced and knowing that Blaine eats less when stressed has Kurt wondering what Blaine hasn’t been talking about. He kisses Blaine’s hip and saves it for a time when they can talk.

As their touches progress, there are no more giggling reminders to be quiet. Now it’s all listening to their pleasure, making patterns and learning how to read inhalations and short jerking movements and what song the metronome sound of a heart speeding up calls for and Kurt wants to sing it all, right into Blaine’s skin. Wants to be able to tie himself to Blaine with words. But he stays quiet, kisses and kisses and kisses him again.

Kurt settles himself further down into the pillows and pulls Blaine up from where he’s been doing this fantastic but kind of tickly thing with his mouth. Blaine climbs up to lay on top of him and Kurt drops his knees to the side.

“Oh,” Blaine whispers, and Kurt sighs when he feels Blaine’s cock against his. It’s dry and they aren’t quite lined up but still good. Blaine leans up on one elbow by his head and runs his other hand down Kurt’s torso, feeling the movement of muscle as Kurt rolls up into him. Touches his hipbone lightly, then spans his hand low so his fingers are digging high behind Kurt’s thigh.

“Blaine,” Kurt whimpers into Blaine’s neck. They’re so close the skin between their bodies is starting to sweat a little. He puts a hand on Blaine’s stomach to push him away and then like he had before, uses his own hand to guide Blaine’s fingers where he wants them. Between his legs it’s humid and hot and he aches. “Touch me.”

“Here?” Blaine’s fingers drag between his cheeks. Their bodies are too close for him to really touch how Kurt wants.

“Yes, yes,” he whimpers when the air hits his body where Blaine had been on top of him.

“Hold on,” Blaine reaches across him to find Kurt’s lube. Kurt’s grabbing at him and pulling him back as fast as Blaine can find it, kissing up his shoulder and to his ear. Blaine settles next to him, kisses him so softly, across his cheekbones and his nose, along his temple and hairline. Kurt drops his legs open and wide and trusts Blaine so much with himself.

It’s different, having Blaine touch him with wet fingers, with intention. It’s so good, better somehow when it’s someone else’s fingers. He’s only done this to himself a few times since he and Blaine talked about it, and loved it. But divorced of the feedback sensation from his own fingers touching _and_ the glitter of nerves where he’s touching, it’s incredible.

“Kurt,” Blaine kisses him, rubs tight little circles against his fluttering, clenching asshole, “you have to be quiet.”

“ _Oh my god_ , Blaine,” he bites Blaine’s shoulder to try to keep himself quiet.

“Can I-?” Blaine presses against him with one finger and his body draws it in before Kurt can even answer.

“Hng- _oh, oh!_ ” Kurt throws his head back, spreads his knees even wider and pushes back with a roll of his hips. “More, now please.”

“Wait, we should do this slower,” Blaine pushes his finger in further. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“It doesn’t-” Kurt grinds down. Even with Blaine’s finger inside, his body feels hungry, aching for more, “Blaine _please_.”

“Okay,” Blaine sounds breathless and unsure but takes his finger out and presses back in with two and Kurt groans with it. They slide in so easily and his nerves are dispatching erratic messages, firing off all through him.

“You have to- oh god Kurt you’re so hot inside,” Blaine covers Kurt’s mouth with his and Kurt tries to keep himself quiet, whimpering each erratic breath as Blaine fucks his fingers in and out. Blaine breaks away, kissing his neck and jaw sloppy and fast, “I have no idea what I’m-”

“It’s great, just like...like that-” Kurt’s skin feels like he’s on fire, sweat dewing and his dick is throbbing so hard. His face must be bright red, he can tell, and he’s almost glad for the cover of darkness because Blaine’s seen him undone but never like this, never when Kurt feels like no more than a burning mass of sensation and nerves and sharp pleasure. “Another?” He says it like a question because he’s never had more than two.

Blaine pulls his fingers out almost all the way, which is an uncomfortable sensation. But then there’s more when he brings them back with a third and it’s all delicious heavy fullness inside. Blaine’s torso is plastered against his, trying to shush Kurt’s staccatoed _ah-ah-ah’s_ with his lips.

“Blaine, you-” Kurt gasps and grinds himself against Blaine’s fingers, “Oh _shit._ Will you- oh -- will you fuck me?”

“Kurt,” Blaine’s fingers pause.

“Please,” Kurt whines and tries to coordinate himself to lean up and kiss him, missing Blaine’s mouth and kissing his chin instead.

“You’ve never...I haven’t-” Blaine pulls his fingers out completely and rests his hand on Kurt’s hip.

“I want it to be you,” Kurt tries to relax but everything is so empty and the need feels so urgent, in his body and in his heart and under his skin and everywhere, he wants Blaine everywhere, anyway he can have him, “if you want.”

“Are you sure?” Blaine puts his forehead against Kurt’s.

“I am. Are you?” He feels Blaine nodding. Kurt twists to fumble a condom from the drawer in the dark. It’s a bit of an adventure, getting it on with the barest of light and their hands to guide them, but they manage.

“How-?” Blaine lays on him tentatively.

“Like this.” Kurt whispers, drawing his legs up so they’re up around Blaine’s waist. Blaine moves away, grabbing a pillow and settling it under Kurt’s hips, then moves to get himself lined up. “Wait.” Kurt draws him in, cradling his face in his hands and kissing him with sweet urgency. That fluttering in his heart is a pounding that needs answering. Blaine’s mouth on his, his tongue and breath and body answers.

Kurt breaks the kiss and then breathes in, filling his lungs completely while Blaine sits up and positions himself. There’s a pause that feels drawn out and then Blaine’s cock is there, pushing gently against him. Kurt closes his eyes and exhales and imagines his body opening, unfurling until there’s a sort of popping then a slide and the most incredible, fulfilling fullness deep inside. Kurt cries out once, turning his head to the side and clamping his legs around Blaine’s hips.

“Kurt, Kurt,” Blaine’s chanting his name, low and broken. He moves by the smallest increments, just sort of grinding against him.

“Blaine, I’m okay,” Kurt gasps. “More please,”

Blaine’s hands settle around his waist and with a shocked inhale he pulls out then presses back in slowly, then again, and again until he’s picking up speed. Kurt doesn’t dare touch himself, he knows he’ll go off the second he does. He never in his life imagined this could give him so much pleasure.

“Kurt, fuck you feel so _good_ ,” Blaine settles back a bit, further away from him but the angle makes up for the loss of closeness. Kurt puts his hands over Blaine’s so that Blaine will grip his hips harder. He wants to beg Blaine to use him, to fuck into him hard and fast but everything is white hot whenever Blaine manages to press against his prostate. And it’s not perfect but it _is_.

“Blaine, I- I’m going to, I can’t not,” Kurt babbles, feeling it build so fast inside. He feels Blaine moving, letting go of his hips and jostling them and almost coming out, but before Kurt can complain, he’s over him, as close as their bodies can get and face pressed close, noses bumping and lips touching.

They don’t kiss so much as breathe against each other, Kurt whimpering and Blaine whispering his name over and over like wonder. His orgasm comes with a flash of heat under his skin then a drawing wave that gathers then explodes and he starts coming, ass gripping and throbbing around Blaine. It’s the most incredible thing he’s ever experienced, being so full and so close to him and letting his orgasm take him and take him and take him. Blaine’s body is tight against him, hardly moving, just the hard press of his corkscrewing hips against him until Blaine comes, seconds after him.

Kurt wraps his arms around Blaine, hard and close and lets himself feel Blaine’s body shaking apart. He kisses Blaine’s neck with the tenderness of afterglow and contentedness and yes, he realizes with a shock, love.

 _Love,_ love.


	6. Chapter 6

“Are you okay?” Blaine says softly in the dark.

They’re dressed. Cleaned up and dressed and curled into each other. Kurt knows there is no way Blaine could have missed the tightening of his body or the hiss he’d let out when he had pulled out. They’d distracted each other with fumbling for clothes and giggling when they kept getting each others instead of their own. Comfortable moments punctuated by small kisses; one from Blaine on his shoulder, another Kurt bestowed to his temple.

Kurt had come back from the bathroom really feeling it, sore and disconcertingly open and trying really hard to keep it from Blaine.

“Kurt, really, are you okay?”

It’s always been hard to keep anything from him.

“I’m fine.” Kurt rolls over, out of Blaine’s arms, to face him. “I think it’s supposed to be pretty normal, all things considered.”

“At the end there it was just-” Blaine traces a finger down Kurt’s nose, “hard to stay in control.”

“I didn’t want you in control Blaine,” Kurt whispers the admission, kissing the fingertips that descend to trace his mouth. “I wanted you. Just you, there with me.”

Blaine puts his forehead against Kurt’s.

“I was,” he says so softly Kurt almost doesn’t hear.

They kiss again, quietly, quietly, then settle down together, tangled up and face to face. Kurt listens to the pattern of Blaine’s breathing, feels the way his muscles slowly give into the mattress. Loves the way his body knows the moment Blaine’s is truly asleep.

He watches the dark for a bit longer. Closes his eyes and re-lives and re-lives and wonders at his own body’s abilities. It’s responses. He’d never thought...god, it is just incredible, the things Blaine can do to him.

Blaine shifts a little, and Kurt pulls back to let him roll over, running one hand over his arm as it goes. Carefully, he lifts the covers and fumbles for his slippers and robe before shuffling into the kitchen. A little warm milk and maybe he’ll be asleep soon enough.

“You guys are terrible at being quiet,” Santana says from the table where she’s drinking something steaming.

“Santana!” Kurt puts a hand over his chest. “Stop skulking around giving people heart attacks.”

“I’d probably stop ‘skulking around’ - whatever the hell that means - if I could actually get to sleep.”

Kurt flushes and looks away. “Noise maker. Ear plugs. We all have them.” God knows Santana and Dani get loud enough that even both have failed him from time to time.

“Look Kurt, we’re gonna have some truth time, okay?” Santana leans forward with her elbows on the table. Kurt flumps gracelessly into the chair, giving up on the idea of warm milk for a bit.

“Hit me,” he says, propping his chin on his hand and rolling his eyes. He’s not really in the mood for another lecture on how friends who fuck only manage to ruin friendships in the long run.

“First, you need to work on the quiet thing. You guys were telling each other to be quiet louder than I hear you on any given day. And by telling I mean _moani-_ ”

“Okay! Okay, okay, stop.” He cannot even look at her, not if she’s going to have the gall to actually imitate what she’d heard.

“Second, what are you doing?”

“Um? Right now? Wishing I had been quieter because then you’d be asleep and I’d have my warm milk already.”

“No, Hummel. What are you doing with them? Adam? Blaine?”

Kurt folds his arms and looks away.

“Listen, I don’t care who you sleep with or how many guys you parade through here, but it doesn’t really seem your style. If it is, I figure I’ll have to take my third eye into the shop for some repair.”

He doesn’t say anything.

“I heard Adam ask you to be his boyfriend. It was adorable. I almost vomited. And then, I heard you and Blainers getting your mack on about half an hour later. That’s fast turnaround.”

“Look I know how it must look-”

“Do you think I care that much? I don’t really give a crap what it looks like. Kurt, I’m your friend. So I’m here, waiting up for you, to tell you that you need to take a hard look at the situation, because for some reason, you aren’t doing what you really want to do here.”

“And what do you think that is?” he challenges her.

“Don’t play dumb. You want to be with _him_ ,” she gestures toward the curtain. “You and Adam, it’s like turning on a lightbulb in a dark room. You and Blaine...well, you tell me.”

“Like he lit up the whole world,” Kurt says quietly.

“Thank god, he sees the light,” she throws her head back, laughing at her own joke, then stands, scraping the chair loudly as she pushes it back.

“Goodnight,” she says, patting his head as she passes, leaving him tracing his fingertip on the table in the hushed night.

~*~

He can’t sleep. He just can’t, not when he lets himself feel the way love had burst from him in Blaine’s arms, not when knowing how in love with Blaine he is has the whole world lighting in front of him. As the room heats with the glow of sunrise, he watches. Watches the walls slowly brighten as day presses in on night until it’s all a buttery yellow. His eyes linger on the curve of Blaine’s shoulder as it comes into that rich olive tan. He watches every part of Blaine’s back move while he breathes and he watches his own fingers come up to trace his spine. His own fingers in Blaine’s hair, taking his time, working them through his curls lightly while he works Blaine gently out of sleep.

Blaine takes a breath, then another, and stiffens slightly before relaxing completely. Even from behind him, Kurt knows that his eyes are open.

Kurt closes the gap between their bodies and puts his face between Blaine’s shoulderblades. Kisses one knob of his spine and speaks, low but clear. “Adam asked me to be his boyfriend last night.”

Blaine’s body stills in a way that Kurt thinks is meant to hide his reaction.

“I didn’t give him an answer.”

“Okay,” Blaine’s voice is sleep scratched. Sleep webs, he’s always called them, clearing his voice until he’s back to his usual self.

“I think last night is the first time I’ve deliberately not talked to you about something that I needed to talk about,” Kurt can feel the warmth of his own breath on his face, so close to Blaine’s skin as he is. “I didn’t know what to say to him. And I wanted to be with you.”

It’s quiet. Kurt licks his lips and thinks about what he wants to say. He feels like this should be scary. Isn’t this a cliche, falling in love with your best friend?

Finally, he says, “I don’t think this is just a friends with benefits thing anymore Blaine. “

“You’re right, it’s not.” Blaine says simply. Kurt sneaks an arm around his waist and puts it flat over his heart. Blaine puts his own hand over it.

“Have you decided what you want to say to Adam?”

“Have you ever wondered why we don’t get jealous?” Kurt says out of left field. “I never resented your relationship with Sebastian.”

“How come?”

“Because no one else will mean what I mean to you, and vice-versa. Does that make sense?”

“Perfect sense.”

“I’ve loved you all along. I knew you loved me, I just didn’t realize I was _in_ love. On paper, you’d think that would mean dating other people would make me jealous.”

“Well,” Blaine muses, “the last few months I’ve learned that being in love doesn’t look like I thought it would.”

Kurt takes a deep breath. “I don’t want to ask you to be my boyfriend because I’m jealous. It’s because...I have so much love in my heart to give, and I want nothing more than to devote it to you.”

Blaine is quiet for a long time. Kurt knows now that he needn’t have worried about finding the right words. For years now he’s known the man here with him, and when Blaine rolls over in his arms to face him, his eyes tell nothing but a story of love.

“So,” Kurt skirts his fingers across Blaine’s cheekbone.

“Oh, there you are.” Blaine says. His smile speaks too, says _I can’t believe this is happening_ and _I’ve never been this happy_. “I’ve been looking for you forever.”

“I am out here and I can absolutely hear you,” Rachel sings suddenly.

“Oh my god,” Kurt finally loses his patience. “You two need to _stop listening in._ ”

Rachel giggles and Kurt closes his eyes.

“I have _got_ to find a new place to live,” he says.

“Aww they love you, I think they have some elaborate bet or matchmaking deal going on,” Blaine says, eyes lighting. He looks up through the sooty sweep of his lashes and bites his lip. He hooks a finger in the neck of Kurt’s sleep shirt, pulls it down slowly and carefully kisses Kurt’s collarbone where it’s exposed, luminous with morning.

“Okay now,” Kurt battles not to sound breathy or too loud, “you cannot start this, they are right there and they are listening!” he says the last loudly enough that he knows they’ll be heard.

“You know what, trust me when I say it’s gonna happen anyway,” he can hear Santana say. “Let’s get out of here and let them have a _we’re done being dumbasses_ fuck and we’ll go shopping for scarves without them.”

“Oh you are-” Kurt hisses, throwing the covers back and glaring at the curtain until Blaine coaxes him back down.

“They’re messing with you. Besides, you know I’ll take you to buy all the scarves you want.”

“Mmm, are you going to be my sugar daddy now?” Kurt says softly, fingers toying with the buttons of Blaine’s pajamas. Blaine laughs.

“No, but I’ll hold the bags.”

“God, you know the best ways into my pants,” Kurt says, smiling into a kiss.

“Your pants were easy, your heart-”

Kurt interrupts cooly, “Don’t go there Anderson, lets keep it a level above romance and not sink to cliched.”

“Kurt,” Blaine laughs. “I’m pretty sure best friends who end up lovers is about the biggest cliche there is.”

“You-” Kurt arches his neck and his best judgemental eyebrow, “-may have a point there. But you’re wrong otherwise.”

“What do you mean?” Blaine asks.

Kurt rolls his eyes. “You got into my heart first silly.”

Blaine’s lips are honey on his, sweet and slow. He kisses Kurt with confidence, with a knowing that Kurt relishes, melting back into the bed.

“I’m in love with you, Blaine Devon Anderson,” he says, voice breathy and heart beginning to speed.

Blaine pushes Kurt’s hair off of his forehead where it’s flopped down in the night, “And I’m in love with you,” Blaine pulls him closer suddenly and rolls over him. “So...have we talked about this enough, can I take your pants off yet? Because I really want to have romantic, _I’m in love with you_ sex right now.”

“ _Blaine,_ ” Kurt says, scandalized because he can still hear Rachel and Santana. He slaps at Blaine’s hands when they wander down to the waistband of his pants. This turns into Blaine slapping back and then they’re tickling each other and laughing, rolling around on the bed.

“Oh my god they’re so gay,” Santana whisper-shouts, then actually yells. “Bye!”

“Oh god,” Blaine lays back panting with a hand on his stomach.

“Wow, you slap fight to win,” Kurt notices, rubbing his thigh where he’s sure there will be a handprint later.

“Only because I know I never will. I fight extra hard to save face.”

“You really ought to just give in,” Kurt rolls up to look down on him and walks his fingers up Blaine’s stomach teasingly.

“Oh?” Blaine says a little breathlessly. “I could be convinced. To give in without a fight,” he puts his hands up next to his head and blinks up at Kurt innocently.

“Wow that is-” Kurt swallows, “I feel like I should think this is pretty cliched as well, but somehow that really, really works for me.”

Blaine smiles, impish and knowing. “I’m totally playing on your control issues.”

“I don’t have control issues,” Kurt says, feeling a little affronted. Blaine just smirks.

“Hold me down.”

“What?” Kurt asks, feeling a little scandalized and aroused.

“Just try it,” Blaine gives him this look, it’s something he’s never seen. A flirty raise of his eyebrow and fluttered lashes and Kurt’s stomach twists up.

“Okay,” he lays over Blaine carefully, bracketing his legs around him. Rolls his eyes because it feels weird to just be laying on him for no reason. Blaine’s still looking at him though, eyes slumberous and dark and wanting. Kurt takes each hand in his own and then looks down at Blaine.

“Press down,” Blaine instructs. Kurt does. Blaine arches a little, then with a breathy little whine to his voice says, “You’ve got me here now. Could do anything to me, couldn’t you?”

“Is that what you want?”

“I guess I do,” Blaine says, then licks his lips and cocks his head a little against the pillow. “You could do anything.”

Kurt knows he doesn’t mean sex.

“Why?” Kurt wonders.

“Because I trust you. Because I know that all I have to do is let go and you’ll take care of me. Because I know you’d never ask too much, take too much, or hurt me in any way.”

Kurt lets go of his hands, cups one of Blaine’s cheeks and feels his eyes well a little. “I’m late to the party, aren’t I?” he asks softly.

Blaine’s eyes don’t leave his. He nods.

“How long have you known?” Kurt lays down next to Blaine, propped up on one elbow, the fingers of one hand brushing the ridge of his collarbone over and again.

“I think I’ve always been in love with you Kurt,” Blaine says. “I just didn’t know it.”

“That doesn’t make sense Blaine,” Kurt frowns. “How can that be if-”

“It just has to,” Blaine says simply. His eyes are glowing tawny and serious and honest. “Because the day I really thought the words for the first time, it didn’t feel like a revelation, just like I finally had the real name for what I was feeling.”

“And when did that happen?” Kurt presses for more detail.

“That night at your house,” Blaine says.

“Twilight night?” Kurt says with surprise laced through his voice.

“Yes,” Blaine rolls off of his back and toward him, cups Kurt’s waist with a warm hand.

“Blaine,” Kurt thinks of the months between then and now, “why didn’t you say something?”

Blaine thinks for a moment, eyes down and lips pursed slightly. “I’ll never be as brave as you are Kurt.”

“No, don’t-”

“Just it’s everything. You’re never scared to be you. You stood down your bullies at McKinley. I ran, Kurt. I’m scared all the time, of not being enough for my parents-”

“Blaine, Blaine-” Kurt flutters distressed kisses over his trembling lips, “no, please don’t.” The tears that threatened a moment ago crest and one drips from his cheek onto Blaine’s.

Blaine closes his eyes and sighs into the next kiss Kurt gives him. “You make me feel safe Kurt. I know that when I’m with you, I don’t have to try to be anyone else, I don’t have to work for you to love me. I was scared to jeopardize that.”

“You’ve been stressed,” Kurt states after a long silence, palming one prominent hipbone.

“Yes,” Blaine responds plainly.

“You didn’t tell me,” Kurt’s thumb worries Blaine’s skin, over and over. “You said you trust me.”

“I do Kurt. But I couldn’t tell you without explaining why, and I was scared. Fear isn’t rational.”

“Don’t be scared anymore. You’re never alone,” Kurt promises fervently, “You’ll never be alone. Even if we fight, even if things are hard-”

“I know,” Blaine says. “Like I said, it wasn’t rational. After last night, I knew I couldn’t not tell you. You just beat me to the punch.”

Kurt laughs. “Ever the trendsetter.”

“You’re an inspiration to us all,” Blaine says with a small laugh. His smile is wider than Kurt’s ever seen it, and he can feel his own the same.

“God,” he kisses Blaine’s cheeks, his eyebrows, the point of his chin, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Blaine’s hand is in Kurt’s hair, breath catching and Kurt can’t tell if it’s held in tears or not. Blaine’s eyes shine bright enough he thinks it might be. He puts a hand on Blaine’s shoulder gently and rolls him back then slowly sets about taking off their clothes. Blaine looks up at him trustingly, bringing one knee up around Kurt’s hip when he lays on top of him. Opens his lips easily and kisses Kurt slow and lush and aching until Kurt feels like his heart is cracking open.

Their skin is slightly tacky from the residue of lube. “We probably should have showered last night,” he says with a small laugh.

“We will,” Kurt says, eyes on Blaine’s lips. Blaine leans up to kiss him again, then sighs and eases out of it.

“Let me-” he reaches for the lube still on the nightstand with one hand. Kurt props himself up on both hands and hovers, looking down and watching Blaine touch himself slowly. Blaine’s dick is red and full. Kurt loves how it looks, head pushing through the clench of Blaine’s fist as it pumps, skin bunching and sliding back. Blaine gets more lube and eases it over Kurt’s dick then. Kurt closes his eyes to the cool touch, rocking in tiny increments against his hand.

“Here,” Blaine releases him, then uses his palm to guide Kurt down and closer. Both knees bracket Kurt’s body, tight to him. Blaine drapes his arms around Kurt’s shoulders, pulls him close and closer, then starts kissing him. Kurt’s hands flex into fists, pulling the sheets taut, kisses Blaine like he’s air. Feels like Blaine is air after months and years of not being able to breathe quite right. Blaine is a revelation against him, and Kurt realizes that he hasn’t. He hasn’t ever really been able to breathe, to live, quite like he can now, pouring love from his chrysalis heart into this man who moves against him so purposefully.

It’s careful. Their movements are slow and measured, punctuated by small gasps and kisses and rooted in the way their eyes hardly leave each other’s. Kurt gets down on his elbows, curling his hands under Blaine’s body to cup his shoulderblades. He wants to draw this out for hours, like he could happily make love to Blaine for every minute of sunlit day they occupy. But his body has its own demands, pleasure gathering like a storm. They break from a breathless kiss and Kurt rests his forehead against Blaine’s, bearing down with his hips. His body jerks as coordination abandons him, and under him he feels Blaine’s trembling and heaving. In the moment before his own orgasm, he curls his whole pelvis between Blaine’s legs, hides his red cheeks and hot face in the cup of Blaine’s neck. He breathes in the sweet tang of Blaine’s skin, sweat and sleep and faint cologne lingering, and lets himself _feel_ , feels Blaine all around him. Blaine holds him so tight when he comes, he’s completely surrounded and safer than he’s felt since he was a small boy.

There’s nothing like after. Not ever in his life does Kurt remember being so at rest. He feels beyond his skin, beyond the muscles and bones, the aches that define his body. He feels nothing like the calm of being loved, mind so at ease. It’s just him, and Blaine, and their slowing breath and hard beating hearts. Through the thin skin of Blaine’s neck, Kurt can feel his pulse.

As he comes back to himself, he feels Blaine’s fingers sweeping up and down his spine.

“I love you Kurt, I love you, love you,” Blaine chants so quietly.

The loft around them is dead quiet. Kurt unburrows himself and looks down at Blaine. His hair is everywhere, corkscrewing and frizzing and his face is rough like sandpaper. Under Kurt’s body he’s boneless, and even somehow _more_ Blaine than he’s ever been to Kurt in his button downs and cardigans, in years of friendship, in gelled hair and perfectly poised solos for every audience he’s had, including just Kurt. Kurt feels more himself with him than he’s ever been. His mind flashes and flits over so many memories; crying the first time he met him and Blaine’s calm acceptance and empathy. The time he laughed so hard with him he snorted Diet Coke through his nose and Blaine laughed so hard in shocked surprise he’d cried. Blaine’s seen him sick and scared, lonely and unsure and Kurt knows right now, never so truthfully as he does right now.

“What?” Blaine smiles up at him and puts his hands on Kurt’s hips, a friendly hold, nothing but bare hands on bare hips, and Kurt’s probably pushing his limits when he thinks, _oh yes_ and feels a little thrill. The man under him is warm and willing and sweetness and raw honest sex appeal and a lot of fun. He’s the love of Kurt’s life, and he’ll never tire of devoting himself to Blaine in any and every way he can.

~*~

It’s near noon when they find themselves dressed again, foraging in the kitchen. Other than occasional giggles when they happen to catch each other’s eyes, they’re quiet. The loft is as bright with sunlight as it ever gets.

“It’s a beautiful day,” Kurt says, face at the window.

“It is,” Blaine murmurs, eyes on Kurt. Kurt can feel his face warm, the too big smile that moves across it. He looks at Blaine for a long moment. He’s put together now, gelled hair reflecting the light where it catches. He’s wearing a brightly colored plaid shirt and blue pants. Kurt’s so in love, he feels stupid with it. He holds his hand out.

“Want to go out?”

~*~

“So what now?” Blaine asks. He fiddles with his biscotti, scattering crumbs.

“What do you mean?” Kurt watches him carefully. “Are you nervous? You’re ruining that biscotti.”

“Just-” Blaine bites his lip, “I’m moving to New York in a month. I was going to live in the loft with you guys.”

“Was?” Kurt looks up from where he’d been focused on his coffee.

“Do you still want me to? Things are different, right?”

Kurt purses his lips and looks out the window while he thinks. People flash by, colors streaming and stuttering as New York pulses along city streets in a dazzle of daylight.

“Are they?” he takes Blaine’s hand. “I don’t want to be naive about this but...I don’t feel like that much has changed.”

Blaine squeezes his fingers and waits.

“I mean other than if you move in, you’ll share my room. Right?” he asks nervously.

“It seems like it would be a waste to move another bed in there if I’m always going to want to be in yours.” Blaine ducks his head but not before Kurt sees his small frown.

“Blaine,” Kurt says, “I want you to move in. I want you with me. But it’s okay if you don’t want to.”

“I do,” Blaine shakes his hand a little where they’re clasping them on the tabletop, “I just want to be sure that whatever we do, this - us - is okay. I don’t want to jeopardize this.”

“Well,” Kurt takes a breath, “you don’t have to decide now. Think about it. This _is_ really new. Maybe we should let ourselves process this before we make a big decision.”

“Okay,” Blaine takes a sip of his coffee.

Regardless of what happens from here out, Kurt trusts in his happiness, because he’s with Blaine. Better, he trusts in Blaine’s happiness, which is the best part of all.

~*~

“God I miss you,” Blaine says before Kurt’s even adjusted the screen of his laptop.

“I miss you too,” Kurt smiles at him wistfully. Blaine’s still in his day clothes, but his bowtie is undone and the first button of his collar is popped. His honey eyes are muted. Kurt wants to kiss him there, just at the lopsided triangle where his collar parts. He wants to wrap his arms around him and breathe him in deep and let Blaine soak into his bones. He wants to bring Blaine comfort and a feeling of home.

“So I’ve been thinking,” Blaine says, fidgeting a little. Kurt can only see his face and shoulders, but knows from his posture that Blaine’s sitting with his knees pressed together with his hands folded between them, ankles crossed. He’s nervous, and serious. “I talked to Sam and Tina for advice. I think...I think I want to move in with you.”

“Yay!” Kurt bounces on his bed and squeals. “Oh my god Blaine, yes, I am so excited!”

“It’s not always going to be perfect,” Blaine starts.

“Blaine,” Kurt interrupts, speaking softly, “I don’t want perfect. I want _you_. I’ve always known you’d be in my life forever, and now I get to have all of you forever. I want it all, being mad at you and making love to you and fighting over small things and getting to wake up with you every morning.”

“Kurt,” Blaine says, eyes shining. Kurt closes his eyes. He loves the way Blaine says his name. No one says his name like Blaine does, like Kurt’s something new and surprising, like he’s something amazing and special. “I want all of that too.”

Kurt beams at him until he thinks of something. “Oh, but you should know I don’t sleep on the couch, no matter how angry I am.”

Blaine laughs. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“And I’ve never had makeup sex,” Kurt says, “but I’m not opposed on principle.”

“Kurt, I don’t know that I’ll ever be opposed to sex with you,” Blaine points out.

“Even when my hair is a mess-”

“Especially then,”

“And my face is gross because I’ve just woken up?”

“Yup.”

“And I’m being a bitch because you’ve taken the last piece of chocolate-”

“That might be a bigger problem for you than me,” Blaine laughs, “since I’ll be on a chocolate high.”

Kurt giggles helplessly. “Well played sir.”

They’re quiet for a moment.

“This is the start of something amazing, isn’t it?” he takes in Blaine’s lovely face and wishes he could run his fingers over his lips.

“Kurt, it’s been something amazing since the moment I met you. That day at Dalton,” Blaine looks down with a soft smile, “I just knew that there was something about you. I didn’t know _what_ , but I do now. I think I was meant to love you from the start. It just took me a while to see it.”

Kurt laughs a bit wetly, using the tips of his fingers to wipe tears from under his eyes.

“It doesn’t feel like it was wasted time though,” Kurt manages, “Every moment of this has been just right,” Kurt doesn’t know if he would have been ready then. If they didn’t need those years to grow up, to grow together.

“It’s been the time of my life.”

Kurt laughs hard enough that the monitor shakes. “Blaine, if you’re going to quote movies at me during sentimental moments, I might have to pick fights with you.”

“Oh I’m not too worried,” Blaine teases, “you’ve already promised me a lifetime of makeup sex.”

“Fabulous makeup sex,” Kurt says, tilting his head and smiling coyly.

~*~

It’s raining the day that Blaine moves in. Thunder covers the rumble of the door opening, surprising Kurt. Blaine’s hair is damp from being caught in it, and the suitcase he’s lugged up thumps onto its side on the floor.

“This is going to be kind of gross, we’ll be soaked in minutes,” Blaine says against the skin of Kurt’s neck, breathless from the hug Kurt’s crushing him with. Kurt kisses him, then kisses him again. He hears someone coming in behind them, presumably Blaine’s parents, but ignores them. Instead he kisses the bridge of Blaine’s nose, his cheeks, collecting rain with his lips as he goes.

“So long as I’m with you,” Kurt promises, “everything is going to be just right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnnd that's the story!! Thank you, everyone, who left me nice messages and encouragement and love. I cannot believe the response this story got, I thought it was just a silly little story I wrote to please myself. 
> 
> Thank you, thank you and thank you to stut-ter and nachochang for helping me whip this beast into shape. Thanks also to likearumchocolatesouffle for talking me through ideas initially and to gleekto for cheerleading so hard while this was posting (and giving me advice!) 
> 
> I have two little cut scenes from the story I might expand on and post. I really loved writing this, so I am not averse to writing more :D


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